


Like Real People Do

by Professor_Bats



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Armitage Hux Apologism, Armitage Hux Needs A Hug, Bottom Armitage Hux, Character Redemption, Consensual Sex, Dark Past/Angsty, F/M, Let Hux Be Happy 2k18, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Self-Indulgent, Semi-Femdom, Submissive Armitage Hux
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-03-01 14:45:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 12
Words: 21,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13297104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Professor_Bats/pseuds/Professor_Bats
Summary: Armitage Hux has, for all practical purposes, snapped. He wasn't sure what caused him to simply grab his greatcoat and steal a command shuttle, but there he was, more or less lost in space.But when he's taken captive by a Chiss smuggler, he find himself becoming the very person he had always been afraid to become, and it's not entirely a bad thing.





	1. Turning Point

To the casual observer, Armitage Hux was _very_ much his fathers son.

Not only did he carry the same fiery red hair and pale skin as Brendol, but he was strict, harsh. Impregnable. A veritable force and figurehead for the First Order to rally behind.

He stood tall above the rest, made tough calls and gave orders. He was trusted by Snoke, the darling of the academy, the fearless leader that stood beside, and occasionally, up to Kylo Ren.

  
But the Armitage Hux on the inside was a different story.

Inside, the man he was now battled constantly with the weak-minded, _soft_ boy his father so hated, the gentle child so abused and left behind back on Arkanis.

  
The boy that flinched at the genocide of the Hosnian system, that cowered inwardly at the sound of his own voice, that feared the hatred and vitriol spilling out over the legion of Stormtroopers on the platform below.

Hux sat in the silence of his chamber, a datapad on the desk before him, his hand cupping his forehead.

His chest felt tight, his blood feeling as though it was pumping at twice the normal speed. He hated this feeling, this ’out of control’, breathlessness. It felt like he was trapped.

Running his fingers through his hair, he sat back, looking at the perfectly made bed, the pristine side table, the wardrobe where he kept his perfectly pressed uniforms. Nothing out of place.

_Just like his father_.

Hux stood up, gritting his teeth as he ripped the blankets off the bed in an act of rebellion, knocking over the side table with one, swift kick and ripping the uniforms out of the wardrobe, throwing heavy synthetic wool everywhere.

He couldn’t do this anymore; this perfection, this precision. He needed to be free of it, even if only for a little while.

Taking his greatcoat and his data pad, he swept out of the room, the deafening whirl of his own pulse filling his ears as he passed down the halls.

Several officers stopped to salute them, but he waved them off, quickening his pace until he was nearly jogging.

Armitage Hux was not an impulsive man by any stretch, but it felt like something inside him had snapped. Like that scared, abused little boy deep inside him had finally broken free, had finally stepped into his own.

In the hangar, no one gave him a second glance, no one questioned him appropriating a command shuttle.

In truth, Hux wasn’t sure where he was going, or what he was doing. He wasn’t sure what this drunken, angry feeling that had swept over him as he made his descent into the vastness of space.

It felt like a small voice was crying out in the back of his head, like his true self had finally awaken from a long slumber.

Armitage Hux, for all intents and purposes, had simply _snapped_.

 

xXx

  
Hux sat slumped in the cockpit, his hands over his face as he grit his teeth.

He really _was_ weak.

He could hardly believe himself right now. How could a man like him let his impulse control just slip away like that?

Now the First Order had him listed as AWOL. There was a price on his head. He was a traitor.

In the back of his brain, his father’s voice echoed, scolding him for being a useless coward.

Armitage slammed his fists down on the console with a grimace, looking around to try to get a grip on himself. His entire life, all his work. Gone.

And on what? A whim? A little voice in the back of his head? That nagging, crawling feeling of being trapped?

He had made three jumps, randomly. It was, in a way, like his body was moving without his consent. Part of it, he understood, was to mask his trail. Even with cloaking devices, he could still be easily found by the Order.

Closing his eyes, he leaned back in the seat, looking out the viewport into the vast expanse of space beyond.

If nothing else, it felt calming out here. Alone in the universe, he didn’t feel his transgressions would actually matter. Yes, he was still a thin, powerless slip of a boy, but everything was meaningless out here.

Armitage pushed those thoughts aside. He hated feeling powerless, he hated feeling like he didn’t matter. He’d had enough of that from his father, now he was doing it to himself?

Cracking his knuckles, he began to type in another set of coordinates, but hesitated before punching them in completely.

In the vastness, a speck of silver flashed as another ship jumped out of hyperspace.

Hux held his breath, narrowing his eyes to see if he could pick out what kind of ship it was.

It didn’t look like it belonged to the first order: it was an A-24 Sleuth with some semblance of a custom paint job. Judging by the structure and the level of damage on the outside, it had to be at least twenty years old.

Hux ran his fingers through his hair as he saw the ships communicator turn red with an incoming transmission.

Fingers shaking, he pressed the call button.

“ _Heeey_ , Jaxom, niiice find.” A woman’s voice called over the radio. “Bet the Order’s pretty ticked you got one of their command shuttles.” She sounded amused.  
“Anyway, I got that uh…that special order for you.”

Hux swallowed hard. Great. A smuggler. Out in the middle of nowhere. He could jump, still, though he might accidentally smash into the smugglers ship in the process.

“Jax?”

Clearing his throat, he glanced nervously at the communication unit, before typing out a message for her to read.

“Unfortunately, the communication system is down. My apologies.” He exhaled as he hit send, sucking nervously on his already chapped lower lip. There was a long silence before she spoke again.

“Okay, yeah…hey, uh, Jax, you okay?”

“I’m fine.” He typed back. It was useless. She saw through it. He could tell she saw through it. Maybe it would buy him some time, however.

Taking a deep breath, he finished punching in the coordinate for the next jump, hitting the buttons and bracing himself for the move.

Instead, the command shuttle gave a lurch, listing sideways as it nearly crashed into the A-24.

“Oh ho ho, _no you don’t_.”

A tractor beam. Fantastic. Just what he needed.

After a few moments, there was a telltale ‘clang’ as the ships docking ports met. Hux stood, wondering how he was going to get out of this mess.

If she was a smuggler, it’s more than likely she’d heard the transmission about him being AWOL, and would probably like to collect the bounty on his head. Or she could take him captive and sell him to a slavers market. Or maybe just kill him and take his ship.

Reaching beneath the console, Hux pulled out the standard issue blaster.

There was nothing but silence. The suspense had Hux on edge, but he was careful, he was trained for this sort of thing.

What was he talking about, he was a strategist. He had gotten passing marks in combat.

The door flew open, circuits overridden from the outside.

Armitage raised the blaster, crouching back behind the seat and firing at the figure in the doorway.

“Oh shit. NOPE.” He felt a familiar, invisible force knock him backwards, the blaster skittering from his hands.

It wasn’t as strong as what he was used to, but it was enough to knock the wind out of him. The figure stepped between him and his blaster, kicking it out of the way quickly.

He watched helplessly as it clanged down the narrow hallway.

“ _Well, I’ll be damned_ , if it isn’t that General that went missing.” The figure crouched, face obscured by a half mask. Hux regained his breath and tried to scramble up.  
There was an arc of electricity and Hux found himself rendered immobile, staring up at the woman before him.

She had long, black hair that was cut in a ‘v’ shape over her nose, and wide, tired looking eyes that were two solid crimson orbs. Her skin was a solid blue-grey, a trademark of her race. She was a Chiss, there was no mistaking it.

“Chill. Not going to hurt you.” She reached out, grabbing him and gently lifting him onto her shoulder. “You’re coming with me, though. You almost had me fooled, you little shit.”


	2. Insolence

Hux stared at his strange hostess, his wrists feeling heavy from the gravity restraints she had clapped him in.

“Just what do you think you are going to do with me, _Chiss_?” Hux hissed, his teeth clenched.

In reality, he was terrified, but he couldn’t let her know that. Or maybe she already knew. Kylo’s use of the force allowed him to peer into someone’s mind, what was stopping her?

She looked at him, one eyebrow raised beneath her bangs.

“Come on, don’t be racist. You’re too cute to be racist.”

Armitage Hux felt his ears turn red, but held her gaze with his, eyes narrowing as his mouth turned into a sneer.

She exhaled beneath the mask, reaching up to remove the contraption “Ah, the cute ones always are.”

Running her hands over her jaw where the mask had pressed against her flesh, she looked at him finally.

“You want some caf? I can make some caf. Or I have Gatalenta tea. We’re gonna be here for a bit, I gotta get this load to Jaxom.”

“ _Tea_.” Hux said, trying to pour as much distain into his voice as he could. Czeska smiled, touching her forehead in a mock salute before going and getting some water to boil.

“SO.” She said, returning with two mugs and two small containers with Bantha milk and what Hux hoped was sugar. ‘What is the illustrious First Order General doing all the way out here?”

Hux said nothing, taking the tea from her, his muscles straining against the restraints.

“Ah, classified business.” She said, stirring an excessive amount of milk and sugar into her tea. Hux appraised her: crass, unrefined. _Classless_.

But now that he looked at her face, he couldn’t help but feel a stirring in his chest, making him feel light as a jubba feather. It made him deeply uncomfortable, but he couldn’t look away.

She had full lips, painted dark, and she always seemed to have them slightly parted. Her nose was straight and soft, neither large nor small. Her eyes were large and tired, made bigger by the black cosmetics she had painted around them.

She wasn’t a great beauty, but there was a sweetness about her features that she was clearly trying to harden with the makeup.

She wasn’t bad looking… _for a Chiss._

Armitage’s stomach churned and he took a long sip of his tea, leaning forward to reach his cup.

She was watching him, her red eyes following his every move, seemingly taking in his own features, though she was frowning slightly.

“What?”

“Just like making you uncomfortable.” She said, rising to her feet when she heard the comm system beeping.

“ _Insolent…_ ” Hux watched her disappear, only to return a few minutes later, looking vaguely annoyed.

“Well, that’s that. Your ship scared off Jaxom, so now I’m stuck with a full load of Kessel’s finest. Know anyone who’s looking to buy a bunch of drugs of questionable legality?”

“I’m sure the New Republic would be interested.” Hux hissed. Czeska laughed a short, hollow laugh.

“Oh, the handsome general has a sense of humor…so tell me, how big is it?” She dropped her voice, leaning towards him with a wink.

She was getting close. Too close.  
Hux’s mouth went dry, trying to maintain his decorum as he stared at her. His eyes betrayed him, however, flicking down at his own lap. He could feel his ears turning red again. Surely she wasn’t asking…

“How big is what?” He spat after a moment, his heart in his throat, his ears betraying his embarrassment.

“That Jogan Fruit you have shoved up your ass.”

Hux nearly choked and Czeska’s face split into a wide, dimpled grin.

It was decided: he wasn’t even remotely fond of her.

xXx

  
A day later, Hux was no closer to finding out his fate than he was when he first got on the ship.

He stayed quiet, observing while she worked, what her body language dictated, the way she propped her feet up on the desk when she was typing on the comm system, one arm slung over the back of the chair while typing with one hand.

“Here’s a question for you.” She punctuated the silence. “Which would you prefer, me turning you back over to the First Order, me dropping you off at a Resistance Base, or me hawking you at flesh market on Kowak?”

Hux balked at the last option. “You wouldn’t.”

“Nah, you’re right.” She said, sitting back and looking at him fully. He could tell by the set of her mouth she was about to say something that would goad him even further.  
“Kowak would ruin my hair. Maybe you’d prefer Orvax IV?”

Hux felt his pulse quicken at the thought of being sold off at a slave auction. What would the First Order think? What would his father say?

 _Surely she wouldn’t_?

Hux avoided her gaze, not liking the feeling the idea was giving him at the pit of his stomach.

He had been in control for so long that the concept of someone taking charge…surely it didn’t _appeal_ to him…

Armitage reached up to run a hand over his hair, certain it was a mess, only to recall the gravity restraints. Instead, his arm simply lurched, sending a spasm of dull pain through his collarbone.

“You’re actually thinking about it?” Her voice was husky with amusement as it cut into his contemplation. “Oh that is _rich_.” She clapped her hands with a giggle.

“You’re a criminal.”

“And water is wet, what’s your point?” She went back to absently scrolling on the computer, that pretty mouth of hers set into a slight smile. “We all have jobs to do, and this ones mine.”

Hux licked his lips, studying her a little closer, the way her eyes fluttered as she read data that flashed across the screen, the way she would occasionally pause to rub her neck.

“If you sat straight your back wouldn’t hurt so much.”

“Okay mother.” She said, giving him a fleeting smile as she glanced over her shoulder at him. Nonetheless, she dropped both her feet to the floor, making an effort to appease him.

After a few more minutes, she sat back with a heavy sigh.

“Well I haven’t the slightest what to do with you, or with this cargo I have below deck. You sure know how to throw a wrench in a girls plans, don’t you?”

“Weren’t you going to sell me off to a slaver?”

“Oh you _liked_ that Idea?” Her red eyes flashed and she shook her head, fine black hair falling around her. “That really got to you, didn’t it? While it would certainly be amusing to see you trussed up all pretty like on the auction block, slavery isn’t my flavor.”

Hux had no response, instead, his ears going red at the thought of her watching while he was bound up in front of a group of strangers.

In all honesty, his wasn’t even sure if she was telling the truth about not being in the slave trade. For all he knew, she could have a cargo hold full of beings bound for the markets at Orvax IV…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will probably be some non-con Kylo/Hux in the next chapter. I'm trying to figure out how to make it easier to skip around for people who are squicked out by it. 
> 
> I'm also working on making all the dicking scenes easily skippable for people who get grossed out by it. Idk how that's gonna work but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> In the mean time, there's a ridiculous amount of fluff incoming.


	3. In Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for rape mention, child abuse in this chapter

The sleeping quarters of the ship were sparse, but Czeska had packed her little alcove with blankets and pillows, which she was now unceremoniously tossing onto an empty bunk in an extremely sloppy attempt to make him a proper place to sleep.

He’d spent the first night on her ship obstinately awake, too stubborn and spiteful to sleep, though he’d paid the price the next day by dozing off on the seat where Czeska had left him.

“Here, just…undo the gravity restraints and I’ll do it.” Hux sighed, his arms falling heavily to his sides.

In all honestly, his shoulders had been aching for hours. It hadn’t been so bad at first, but the last few minutes of standing and watching the Chiss woman attempt to make a bed was starting to really nag on him.  
Hux felt like his arms would pop out of socket at any point.

“Do I need to explain to you why everything about that suggestion is a terrible idea?” She said, kneeling on the bed and clumsily pushing a sheet across it.

“Please…” Armitage stammered, watching her. It felt like he was going to pop a blood vessel, or worse, if she continued. “I can help.”

“I’m sure you can.” She scooted off the bed, turning to look at him with a tired expression. “Okay. All right. Fine. Let’s see your wrists.”

Slowly, he lifted his aching arms and she unlocked the restraints, letting them fall to the floor with an unceremoniously loud ‘ _thud_ ’. Hux rubbed his wrists, casting a sidelong glance at her.

She had been able to use the force earlier, what would stop her from using it on him again? If he even raised a hand against her, she could easily choke him, as Kylo had done so many times before…

“No funny stuff, okay?” She said, grabbing another blanket off her bed and tossing it onto the mess she’d made of his.

“Oh, that’s rich, coming from you.” He took the blanket from her, feeling his heart flutter as his own hand brushed hers.

He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting, but maybe he thought her hands would have been colder than they were…

He _hated_ the effect she had on him.

Hux looked up to the ceiling to break the moment, focusing hard on the small ventilation unit that kicked out recycled air into the room.

That voice in the back of his head, the same one that had previously urged him into running, seemed to be stirring again, though what it wanted he wasn’t sure, or at the very least, he didn’t care to listen at this point. It had only gotten him onto trouble so far.

Czeska paused, and out if the corner of his eye, he saw a smile split her features.

“Aw, you think I’m funny?”

He pursed his lips, yanking the blanket from her hands sharply, trying to regain his composure.

She shook her head with visible amusement, handing him a pillow as he smoothed out the disaster she’d made of the sleeping space.

After a while, she left him alone to undress, dimming the lights to make it easier for him to sleep.

Hux wasn’t the sort of person who needed a lot of sleep. In fact, he generally hated the entire process, doing everything he could to avoid it.

But there seemed to be little else to do aboard this ship, other than contemplate his own stupid impulses or listen to Czeska’s attempts at being witty.

The bed wasn’t terribly comfortable, and he found himself missing his regulation bed back on the Finalizer, but he was able to sleep after a few hours of lying there and listening to the ventilation system clanging around.

He wasn’t sure if it was the newness of his sleeping area, or that disturbing, nagging presence of guilt in the back of his head, but he dreamt of being on Arkanus once more.

The rain that seemed to persistently engulf the planet beat down as he stared up at the harsh, stark walls of the academy. The terrain around it was warped, but familiar, as if the topography had been smoothed out in his mind. He felt like he could see for miles around him, but it made him feel raw, exposed.

Hux was brutally cold, the wind and rain flogging his bare skin. His own slender fingers gripped at his sides in an attempt to pull some warmth back into himself.

His sense of self shifted, and he wasn’t sure if he felt more like a child or an adult, but he certainly felt like a small, skinny, terrified boy.

His father was here: he could hear the man talking, but Armitage’s mind couldn’t make out quite what he was saying, despite his best efforts to comprehend.

He gasped for air, the rain staining his face and the moisture seemingly filling his lungs as he strained desperately to comprehend what his father was saying: His life depended on it. He could see the murder in those blue eyes.

Brendol stared down at him, seeming to be twelve feet tall, stern face looking grey in the strange light of the dream. He was angry, and Armitage could practically feel the hatred radiating from his the older man.

“ _Stupid, weak, useless boy_.”

Hux felt the sting of the back of his father’s gloved hand, feeling himself fall to his knees before him. He was naked now, vulnerable. Kylo Ren was there, watching, sneering.  
Always second fiddle to Kylo Ren…

“ _Miserable, traitorous whore…_ ”

Armitage looked down at the mud beneath his fingers, his face stinging with embarrassment and anger.

He was shaking, his voice lost in his throat. He had played the role of good soldier, of good son, for far too long.

Hux wanted to yell at his father that he wasn’t scared anymore, that he was making his own path now. That Brendol Hux had no power over the thin, trembling, pale boy in the mud.

But when Hux tried to open his mouth, to scream, to yell out in defiance and rebellion, he found his voice lost in his throat, muscles contracting painfully.

Suddenly, he was on board the Finalizer, Kylo now towering in the place of his father, one fist raised in the air as he cut off Hux’s oxygen supply.

“Your father was right…You’ll _never_ be anything. Snoke doesn’t even acknowledge your efforts...” He could feel the weight, Kylo pressed against him, rutting his hips against Hux. The redhead could feel the heat of the other man’s member pressing against him.

“ _You’re nothing more than a bastard_ …a tool, to be used and broken. Cast aside…”

This wasn’t fully a dream, Hux understood. It was more akin to the weight of a memory, magnified within a dream.

He could feel Kylo’s hand in his hair, Hux’s own face pressed harshly downward as the other man seemed to split him open with little care for comfort or pleasure. Hux’s head swam from lack of oxygen. He should have passed out by now, but Kylo was keeping him on the edge of consciousness.

A voice cut through the fog that had filled Hux’s mind. It was vaguely familiar, deep and husky. The dull pain in his lower back slowly faded as blue arms wrapped around him, gripping him with a soft warmth. He fell into them, the world vanishing around him as he felt a weight on his forehead.

“Hey, Sleeping Beauty.” Czeska was pressing a disposable cloth to his forehead carefully as he opened his eyes, flinching away from her out of impulse.

Hux sucked in as much of the sweet, recycled air as he could, as if he had actually been choked, looking up at the woman leaning over him. Her other hand was on his shoulder, cool hand pressing gently, reassuringly, against his feverish flesh.

“It’s okay, it was just a dream.”

Armitage looked at her, his mind becoming sharper as he regained consciousness.

“Drink some water.” She held up a bottle for him, smoothing his hair with her other hand. Hux pulled himself up, taking it gratefully as he continued to try to catch his breath, his chest heaving.

“Gently, now, don’t hyperventilate.” She was petting him softly, each stroke a slow signal to breathe. Pride told Hux to shrug her hand away, but a small, selfish part of him enjoyed the sensation of her fingers in his hair. “You’ll be fine, it’s just me here…”

He felt simultaneously hot and freezing at the same time. He had been crying in his sleep, his face damp with tears and his lips dry.

“You were…in there…” He felt violated, wondering how long she’d been inside his head, quietly observing his dream. Had she seen what Kylo had done? Had she seen him deemasculated and vulnerable, trembling and crying?

“I was, but only when you stopped breathing. I got worried...you sounded so upset at first…” Her eyes and her voice were soft with understanding as she drew the blankets up around his shoulders, eyes flickering across the smattering of scars and freckles that dotted his paper-thin flesh. She was trying not to stare.

No one had ever, in his living memory, looked at him with such tenderness as he saw in Czeska’s eyes at that moment.

It was now, that small, scared voice of himself as a child, living in the back of his head spoke, telling him what he had really been looking for.

Armitage looked down at the now empty bottle in his hand, and back up at Czeska. She had withdrawn her hand, taking the bottle from him.

“Will you be allright? Would you like me to stay here for a bit?”

Hux’s mouth was inexplicably dry, his stomach churning. He had to say something. Do something. _Anything_.

Without thought, he leaned in and planted a soft, chaste kiss on her jaw.

Another act of pure impulse that Hux immediately regretted.

She blinked, taken aback, her cheeks flushing and her crimson eyes wide. She sat for a moment, frozen.

“I…” Hux found himself suddenly embarrassed, unsure where the act had come from. Had he misread the situation?

She leaned down after a moment, her lips meeting his forehead with a softness that was unprecedented.

He had never been kissed like this before. It was gentle, full of kindness, with no promises or expectations.

Hux had been intimate before, certainly. He’d experienced rough, wanton kisses, filled with lust and bodily need, but nothing beyond that. He’d been cleft in two, eaten up, licked and fucked without mercy.

This was completely different…

Czeska’s hand cupped his face gently, her thumb running over his cheekbone as her eyes took in every detail of his face. “It’s okay, go back to sleep, I won’t jump in again unless you’re in danger.”

Hands trembling, he reached up, touching her thick, black hair, letting it run through his fingers as his heart beat against his chest faster than he had ever thought possible.

_No, this couldn’t be…this wasn’t him…_

But he wanted it so bad he could taste it: that delicious, soft attraction. That affection he had been _denied_ for so long.

The boy inside was yelling at him, telling him to finally own up to this: that this had been what he had been seeking all along. That this is why he had stolen the shuttle.

Closing his eyes, Hux silently accepted it: what he had been looking for was love, validation and belonging.

Part of the reason he had left the _Finalizer_ was the sudden realization that he wasn’t, nor would he ever be, accepted or loved there. He was feared, feared like his father. It wasn’t him; it was the man his father forced him to become.

“Hey, scoot over.” She nudged him out of the way, getting onto the bed beside him and draping her arm around him so his head was resting against his shoulder. She tugged the blankets around his shoulders. “Better?”

“Hmmm…” He felt…different, somehow. Raw, but lighter. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to share a bed with her, but having someone right there made him feel a sense of relief.

“I’ll be right beside you.” She said, her other arm drawing across his chest to pull him tighter against her. “So get some rest, alright?”

Resting his head against her, he drifted back to sleep, the steady rhythm of her heart providing a small comfort to the rawness he felt within.

For once in his life, even amidst the uncertainty of what would happen next, he felt safe.

xXx

Three days later, he sat down across from Czeska at the small metal table in the kitchen area. She was opening nutrition packets, emptying them into a bowl of hot water in an attempt to make a slurry somewhat similar to oatmeal.

“We are eventually going to have to go on a supply run.” She said as he passed her a small skillet of scrambled eggs and something that looked akin to Arguez Sausage.

There was something maddeningly domestic about the situation that made Hux’s mind reel, his heart in his throat. It felt like an illusion that would be ripped away at any second.

  
The unspoken truce that had formed between them was more than he could comprehend. He could, at any point, go into the cockpit and change the navigation to wherever he felt like.

But he simply chose not to, for reasons that baffled even himself.

What would he even do if he could go back to the First Order, anyway? He would be imprisoned at best, and at worst, executed.

And fate only knew what they would do to Czeska…

So he was more or less content to let her do as she pleased. He couldn’t deny the physical safety that came with her companionship, though he was less than willing to admit the emotional elements that kept him rooted in the ordeal.

She stayed out of his head, as promised, never pried or asked questions. If nothing else, she was true to her word.

“What is your proposal?” Hux crossed one knee over the other as he sat across from her, trying to focus on the task at hand, his shoulders squared perfectly.

“My _proposal_? Did I need to file some paperwork with you?” Czeska teased, spooning some of the slurry into her bowl, dimples forming in her cheeks as she smiled.

“You know what I mean.” He exhaled through the sides of his mouth in what was almost a laugh. Czeska pressed her lips together, a smile playing at the corners of her mouth.

“Well, I’ve been looking for buyers for the uh… cargo. I may have found one on a base near Teth.” She said, her tone becoming more serious as she scrolled through her comm pad. After a moment, she slid it over for him to look at. “Politically neutral. The problem is we don’t know if we’ll be seen by your buddies with the Empire…”

“ _First Order_.” Hux corrected, feeling a slight tick of annoyance, more out of habit than anything. The First Order certainly wasn’t the Empire, though they were trying to restore the previous balance…

“Oh, my apologies, General. _Your First Order_ friends _._ And that lovely little shuttle you commandeered is sort of a dead giveaway.”

Hux nodded, deciding not to react to her hint of sarcasm. Weighing his options, he took a moment to use his knife to push re-constituted eggs onto his fork.

He wasn’t much of a warrior, this was true, but he was known to be an excellent strategist. He wouldn’t have made if all the way to General…no, to _Grand Marshall_ , if he weren’t good at something…

Bitterness soured his mind as he thought of Snoke and his refusal to promote him. Perhaps that, in a way, was yet another one of the reasons for him becoming fed up.

“We’ll have to get rid of my ship, then.” His tone was frank, though he couldn’t help but feel fear. Once the ship was gone, that would be it. No turning back.

“It’s hot goods.” She said, furrowing her brow in contemplation as she raised her eyes to meet his. “It’s new and recognizable, not a terribly big market out there. People don’t want traceable goods.”

“What about on Jakku? Tattooine?”

“Solid options. Consistently sleezy. We could make a smuggler of you, yet.” She gave him a wink from across the table, brandishing her fork. “The problem is, no one on either of those planets has the cash for it, so you’d have to lowball it.”

She took a long sip of water, pulling a stray strand of hair away from her mouth absently as she looked at the comm pad. “There is one option: we could try to market it to the Resistance…”

“No.” Even if he was AWOL, even if he was fed up with how he was treated by the First Order, tired of being second-best to the impetuous Kylo Ren, he could never bring himself to aid the Resistance.

Typing with one hand and eating with another, Czeska brought up a holomap of the Galaxy, panning around a bit, looking at the data for different systems.

“Realistically, we’re looking at wild space here. We could try the Hutts. The main syndicate generally has a lot of wealth to toss around, and they do enjoy shiny new things...”

Hux nodded, discomfort in his stomach growing. “Will you be the one handling the deal? Or shall I?”

He could practically hear his father screaming, feel the slap of leather against skin as he let his cowardice slip. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to regain control over his own mind.

“Would you like me to handle it? Because I won’t make you do anything you’re uncomfortable with. I know you’re a bit out of your element here.” She reached forward, gently placing her hand on top of his. “We don’t even have to get rid of it, we just need to find a place to stash it before we get ahead of ourselves.”

Armitage felt his mouth go dry as Czeska sat back, her face serious as she considered him. There was no teasing in her statement.

“We don’t have to make a decision immediately, we have a day or so.” She reminded him, rising to clear their empty plates into the washer.

He had never been given the opportunity to genuinely take charge of his life like this, to have someone who would actually be supportive. It had always been someone else deciding his fate for him.

“I think…I want to get rid of it.” Saying it felt like a weight was being taken off his chest. Armitage inhaled sharply, squaring his shoulders and lifting his chin in an expression of certainty. “Get rid of it, I don’t need it anymore.”


	4. Calling You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Tw for rape mention, violence mention in this chapter. Also, Hux finally smiles.

Hux had extremely limited experience with Hutts.

He had only ever seen one once or twice in his life, and he had to admit, it wasn’t in the most flattering of circumstances for them.

Czeska had found a buyer just off of Nal Hutta, a local crimelord named Rotta, who had ties with the main crime syndicate.

“I don’t want to tell you to stay on the ship.” She said, absently running her fingers through Hux’s soft, red hair as she stood behind him, looking at her comm pad in her other hand. “But I do think it’s for the better that no one sees you until we’re well out of the Y’toub system.”

“I know.” Armitage said, reaching up and smoothing his hand over hers and looking up at her.

The contact was strange, personal, but not unwelcome.

There was kindness in her eyes that made his throat tighten. He knew she wouldn’t intentionally force him to do something. He hadn’t known her for very long, but he just had a feeling he could trust her implicitly.

It was the same feeling that had led him to running out the door, to stealing the very ship that had brought them to this ragtag spaceport.

“If something happens, you need to take the _Sabaton_ and get out of here. My brother's family is on Ankus, they’ll help you if you just tell them you’re with me.” She said absently. “I have a message automatically set to send in three days if I don’t come back.”

Armitage winced inwardly at the thought, of her being this prepared, this casual about the possibility of her own demise. She would have made an excellent officer for the Order, but for her tendency to push buttons. She had intelligence, charisma, and the capacity for calculation…

He knew her instructions weren’t a request, nor a command. They were an _offer_ more than anything, her eyes soft, almost pleading with him.

_Keep yourself safe…_

She was concerned for his safety, his well-being…his happiness…

Hux wanted to grab her, to pull her close and tell her that everything would be all right, to take her face in his hands and kiss her.

He had become addicted to contact with her, with the feel of her lying beside him on the nights his dreams caught up to him, with the scant, chance touches of skin-on-skin when they passed in the tight hallways. It was almost an addiction, a fixation. He hadn’t taken it further than that, but the thought of anything more sent chills down the former general’s spine.

Hux wondered of it was healthy: he had been reliant on his father, on the idea of the Empire, then the First Order, on other people’s ideals for so long, that he wondered if getting emotionally involved like this with the first being that was remotely nice to him was the best idea.

But on the other hand, she was kind, maybe a little chaotic and certainly morally grey, but she seemed to want him to think and act for himself, which is more than anyone had ever done for him. And Hux wasn’t sure he could make it without being told what to do in some way or another.

Maybe, if nothing else, she could help him establish himself.

Czeska’s time away from the ship gave him a chance to reflect, but he couldn’t help but feel nervous, pacing back and forth as he waited for her return.

_What if something had gone terribly wrong?_

He sat in silence, listening to the local comm chatter, waiting for signs of anything running afoul, his fingers drumming nervously on the dashboard as he looked out across the small spaceport.

It had been cobbled together out of random pieces of other stations, some Imperial, some much, much older than that. It didn’t even seem structurally stable, but from the reputations that hutts had across the galaxy, its disheveled appearance was no doubt deceiving.

There was a loud, metallic groan, followed by a crash and the screeching sound of metal dragging against metal.

The ship shuddered, lifting a little before shifting sideways ever-so-slightly. The pressure dropped for a moment, and Hux felt his ears pop painfully from the depressurization, panic rising in his throat.

Then the sounds of running footsteps up the hallway punctuated the panic, footfalls coming steadily towards the cockpit.

Adrenaline pumping, Hux forced himself into a little alcove, his hand instinctively going for his long-absent blaster.

_Damnit, he was unarmed…_

“Buckle up, hot stuff, we gotta go.” He heard Czeska yell, her voice cracking from stress. She sounded off, her voice broken and hoarse.

Hux immediately followed the sound of her voice to the cockpit, arriving just in time to see the ship immediately jump into hyperspace.

“What happened?” He grasped the back of the copilots chair as the ship gave a lurch. Czeska didn’t look up, her skin looking unusually pale in the bright, flashing lights beyond the windscreen.

“Czeska! What happened?” His voice was raised in panic and he could see her flinching away from him.

“Your shitty First Order buddies were there.” She spun in the seat to look at him. He could see bruises on her neck, her eyes sagging with exhaustion as a cut trickled a steady stream of blood from her forehead. “That black-cloaked bastard got me. Your ship was a _dead fucking giveaway_.”

Hux felt his stomach twist as he looked down at her.

Kylo Ren…

“I didn’t know.” He sat in the chair opposite to her, pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket and pressing it to her forehead. “I didn’t know.”

She leaned forward, her dark hair falling around him. He could see blood drying on her lips, a bruise forming beneath her eye. Her eyes had shifted to a color paler than before and he knew she’d been deprived of oxygen.

He knew that haggard look all too well; he had seen it on his own face too many times.

“I know.” She reached out, touching his hair. She was shaking, though she seemed to be trying to hide it.

“Come on.” Hux rose, taking her hands in his. “You need rest. It’s my turn to take care of you.” She rose to her feet, avoiding his gaze with a strained smile.

“I almost forgot…” She rummaged in her pocket for a moment, pulling out a debit chip. “Your share of the spoils.” Hux took the chip from her, pocketing it without looking at it before helping her back to the sleeping quarters.

xXx

In the hours that followed, Hux had a hard time trying to force Czeska to stay in bed.

She kept getting up and tweaking the cloaking system, recalculating their jumps.

“The farther we can get away, the better.” She was scared, he could feel the fear radiating from her. “We can’t stay in one place for too long.”

“What about Teth?”

“ _Fuck Teth_. I can sell spice anywhere.” Czeska spat, barely looking at him as she scratched her scalp nervously, her fingernails digging in viciously.

Hux sat in the copilot’s seat, crossing one knee over the other and folding his hands in his lap as he looked at her.

“Czeska, I know what you went through.” He began.

Czeska dropped her hand from her head with a sigh, flexing her fingers as if she’d held them in place for a long time.

_“Armitage…”_ She turned to look at him, her eyes tired.

“I know.”

“He knew…about you. I kept as much as I could locked up…but he knew. He showed me things…”

Hux’s mouth went dry and he put both his feet on the floor.

“What…kind of things…” Fear struck through him, fear that she would see the real him; the man that had ordered the Hosnian Genocide, the angry, insecure General who was never appreciated, never acknowledged. The hard man, who was callous and cruel, brimming with hatred.

Kylo had been inside his mind, as well…he knew all of Hux’s weak points, and just how to exploit them. Just how to present them in a way that would make Czeska hate him.

Czeska was quiet, her normally vibrant personality subdued. It deeply disturbed him to see her like this.

“You know I can use The Force. I try not to but…when my life is in danger…when I feel my life is in danger, that is. I don’t want to be like that. I don’t want to be like him.”

“You’re nothing like him.” He could sense she was avoiding telling him what Ren had shown her. In a way, he suspected, but he didn’t want to bring it up.

“When he showed me what he had done to you…I lost it. I lost my temper. I attacked. I don’t think he was expecting it. I think I caught him off guard.”

Hux felt the lump rise in his throat, feeling his cheeks flush with embarrassment and anger.

“He _knew_... He blamed me for your departure. He said I called you away, that I had you under my control.”

Hux wasn’t sure what to do. He had never been good in intense emotional situations. Or situations with any sort of emotion at all. He wanted to pull her close and never let go. To sink himself into her, heart and soul.

Instead, he simply sat there, his hands against his knees, acutely aware of how dry the recycled air was.

Even if she had called him away from the First Order, he had felt better here than he had ever felt in his entire life. He finally had a degree of agency that he’d never been afforded before.

He stood, awkwardly scooping her up in his arms. She was heavier than he thought she would be and his knees buckled a little under the weight.

She was startled, but put her arms around his neck, leaning on his shoulder. He carried her back to the sleeping quarters and laid her on her bed.

“You are overthinking things. You’re letting him get to you.” He brushed strands of hair away from her face, his own hands shaking. “It’s what he wants.”

She was like an open book, her face betraying her emotions, but it made it much easier for Hux to understand her. He wasn’t sure how far the Sith had taken it, but he felt nothing but anger towards the younger man.

Hux couldn’t have anything to himself without Kylo putting his hands on it, and Czeska was now no exception.

The amount of animosity he had attacked the woman with made Armitage’s hands shake as he bushed the hair away from her neck to look at the constriction bruises. There were no fingerprints. There rarely were. Just a band of darkening flesh, almost completely even.

It looked like she had been hit in the face, or suffered some kind of impact, the blood pooling beneath her eye, her lip split.

He wondered how far Kylo had taken it, his hand hovering at her waist. He didn’t want to pull at her overclothes without her consent, but he couldn’t help but feel nervous, terrified that the other man had gotten to her the same way he had invaded Hux…

It wasn’t a fate he’d wish on anyone…

He leaned down, gently kissing the swelling flesh on her upper cheek, before leaning up and letting his lips trail across her temple, letting his fingers smooth across her firm shoulder. She opened her eyes to look at him, that beautiful smile playing weakly across her features.

“Stay with me for a while? I missed that handsome face.” She reached up, stroking his red hair softly. Hux finally let his own blushing smile break his careful façade as he leaned in, kissing her softly.


	5. A Mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This here chapters got some of that explicit sex the folks these days like so much, so you know...uh...read at your own risk.

Czeska’s eye had swollen almost shut, but her mood had improved since their emergency departure from Rotta’s spaceport.

                Hux felt it safe to assume that she hadn’t been victimized like he feared, but he also know that, while she was very frank and open with her emotions, she may have been trying to spare his feelings.

                “Well, I’m a mess.” Czeska said, fiddling with the map on her comm unit as she touched her swollen face. “But we need to stop somewhere remote and stock up. Maybe get you some less conspicuous clothes…or just get you in less clothes, I’d be happy either way.”

                He rolled his eyes, feeling his ears turn red despite her teasing tone.

                “Are you sure you want to try that again?” Hux slid a plate of re-heated food in front of her, before sitting at the table across from her.

                “I’m not going to run forever. First of all, we’re almost out of supplies and the depressurization messed with the reserves, second of all, fuck that guy.” She put the comm pad down, looking at him, a fire behind her crimson eyes. “And fuck everything he did to you. It’s like you said, I can’t let him get to me, but if I ever find him...”

                Hux knit his eyebrows, smiling ever so slightly. It was an expression he found himself slowly getting used to, though it was still a bit foreign. “It’s not going to do you any good if you get caught and killed.”

                “You’re right.” She pointed her finger at him as she took a long drink of water. “I don’t like it, but you’re right.”

 “So.” She continued. “We need an out-of-the way spaceport. We’re close to the Mytaranor system. Wookies are good, reliable. Won’t sell us out to the First Order…Might sell us out to the Resistance, but…” She shrugged. “We’ll take it as we come, right?”

                Hux couldn’t help but feel a certain apprehension at the thought of going anywhere near those smelly, beastly creatures. They were formidable, terrifying, towering beasts that could snap at a moment’s notice. Or, so he’d been told.

                “We’ll have to do something about a disguise for you. Nothing major, just enough to scramble facial recognition.”

                Hux nodded, pushing the food around his plate in contemplation.

                Czeska helped him set temporary dye packs off in his hair, running her fingers through until the bright red had turned a deep shade of brown.

                “I’m going to miss that beautiful red hair of yours…” She said wistfully, washing her hands off in the refresher sink before kissing him softly on the forehead.

                Hux stood, looking at himself in the mirror, noting how foreign the man on the other side was.

                He reached up, absently parting his hair into its former style, looking at the way the dark hair changed his entire appearance.

                “We’ll have to see if we can so something to mess with the scan points for facial recognition, too.”

                “Can we turn my skin blue?” He said, tilting his head back and looking at how gaunt his face seemed with the dark hair.

                “Ehhh, I don’t have anything that would do that on hand, sorry. We’re flying by the seat of our pants here.” She said, pulling some sort of wand out of a small bag on the counter that she was sitting on. “Now hold still. We just need a few lines here and there to scramble the software.”

                “What are you..?”

 She pulled him closer until he was standing between her knees, their bodies almost touching. His put his hands on her waist, pulling himself as close to her as possible as she locked his hips with her knees.

                “Hold still, I know what I’m doing. Sometimes.” She took his jaw between her fingers, holding it in place while she carefully drew lines coming down from his eyes, going over the bridge of his nose and across his cheekbones.

                “Now, you’ll just put on my respirator and no one will know.” She said, messing his hair up gently with her fingers, adding some body. “Are you comfortable with this?”

                Hux glanced back at himself in the mirror, almost unable to recognize himself: he now had dark lines going down his nose and over his cheeks. She had done a decent job of emulating a Parthovian slave’s tattoos.

                “Why do I have to be a slave? What’s the logical purpose?”

 “Turns me on, I guess.” She teased, grabbing his hair and giving him a rough, possessive kiss before sliding off the counter. “Let’s try to focus, we have an hour before we reach port…no one will cast you a second glance it they think you’re a slave…”

                Hux watched as she left, his head swimming at the thought of being her slave. Surely he didn’t find the idea arousing, but the swell in the front of his pants betrayed him.

                He jogged after her, stopping her in the hall and pressing her against the wall to return the rough kiss.

                “You can’t just kiss me like that and run off.” He breathed, his lips barely touching her skin. She shivered beneath his touch, her eyes meeting his. “You can’t just call me a possession and not claim me…”

                “If you smudge your makeup, I will destroy you.” She breathed, pulling him close, her muscular body coiled against his as she tugged impatiently at his undershirt.

                He moved in close to her, letting her take control of the situation. “Is that a promise?”

                Hux was now acutely aware of the differences in their forms. He was fit, fit enough to pass marks with flying colors, but compared to her, he seemed skinny.

                “Damn…you’re like a painting…”  She breathed, pulling his shirt off over his head, her mouth moving to his shoulder, lips moving across the smattering of freckles, kissing his collarbone. She pulled him close, her hands moving across scarred flesh as if to memorize the feel of his body. 

He couldn’t help but feel a little uncertain, avoiding her gaze as his whole body seemed to flush, his member twitching painfully in his pants. He’d never been so emotionally invested in a partner before and he couldn’t shake the fear of judgement.

                Her hand moved up his slender stomach, teasing with her fingertips as she stroked the rise of muscle and flesh, up his smooth chest and onto his lean shoulders.

                Czeska’s mouth dipped softly into the hollow of his collarbone, her other hand dipping below the waistband of his pants. Skillful fingers smoothed over hipbones, teasing the red curls that surrounded his member.

                “Don’t…stop…” He moaned, his own shaking hands tugging desperately at her clothes, eagerly exploring her skin, memorizing every curve, every scar, every rough patch of skin. He wanted to see her body, the same way she saw his…

                “I’ll stop.” She said softly, withdrawing her hand from his pants as her lips moved back to his mouth. This time the kiss chaste and sweet.

                “No…” He whined, desperate for her touch again. He was prepared to beg for it as he pulled at her roughly, tugging at her hands. “ _Do_ _n’t stop…”_

He felt her breathe softly in realization before she sank to her knees before him. Hux felt his mouth go dry as she slowly freed his member, letting her pleasantly cool fingers work the length of his shaft, the callused pads brushing over his skin, sending shivers throughout his body.

                His knees weakened and he had to brace himself against the wall as her warm breath ghosted over the tip of his member, her lips teasing the tender flesh of his thighs.

                “Red down here, too…” She breathed, meeting his eyes with a smile, her fingers trailing against the red curls. “So beautiful…”

                “ _Please…_ ” Hux breathed, feeling himself twitch as he reached down and took his shaft in his hand.

                “None of that now, let me take care of you…” She breathed, brushing his hand away and kissing her way up the shaft before parting her full lips, taking him slowly into the warm, wet heat. He was staring down at her, watching himself disappear into that perfect mouth of hers.

                Hux swallowed hard, his eyes fluttering as she lathed her tongue across the glands, swallowing him down with a slow, deliberate rhythm that sent his mind reeling, toes curing inside his boots.

                He exhaled roughly, his mind going numb from the stimulation, her fingers pressing softly on his hips, thumbs brushing over the thin, sensitive flesh.

                He had to keep himself from thrusting into her throat like she was some cheap off-base whore, his hips shaking as he struggled to keep his body in check. The sounds she was making down there were ungodly, delicious…

                Hux let out a low moan, surprising even himself at how desperate he sounded.

                “You really want this, don’t you?” Czeska pulled back, Hux’s cock glistening with saliva.

                Hux reached down with one shaking hand, resisting the urge to grab her by the hair.

                “Ah, be a good slave boy, don’t get too handsy…” She pulled away, teasing his cock with her tongue, her eyes sparkling softly. “I’d hate to have to punish you…”

                “Punish…me…” He gasped, his voice thin and pleading as she went down on him again, running her fingernails up the back of his legs and gripping his ass tightly. Electricity seemed to surge through him and he felt his head begin to spin.

                “Only if you ask me sweetly…” She teased, but it was too late. He could feel that sweet, white-hot pressure building up behind his navel.

                “Please!” He felt the cry rip from his throat, broken with desperation and shaking as his cock twitched deliciously, feeling that blissful electricity pouring through his body. “Please, I..”

                His throat was dry, choked as he released, his brows knitting as Czeska finished him off, cleaning up the last of their sin with her tongue, letting a soft sigh of contentment escape her lips.

                “That wasn’t so bad, was it?” She smoothed her hands over his hips, up along his stomach as he tried to calm down.

                “Sorry…” He breathed, catching his breath as he felt his limbs grow weak. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to…I made a mess…”

                 “I like that mess.” She licked her lips, seeming to savor his taste carefully as she stood. “Are you all right? That wasn’t too much, was it?”

                “I’m fine...” He gasped, not realizing how much oxygen he’d deprived himself of. She had her arms around him, her hand brushing his hair out of his face, stroking his jaw as he came down from the high. He squared his shoulders, regaining his composure. “I’m fine.”

                “Loosen up, hmm? No one will believe you’re my pet if you’re all uppity like that…” She teased, kissing him again, letting him taste a hint of himself on her lips. “Unless you really want me to put a Jogan fruit up that tight ass of yours.”

                He felt his ears turn red again, returning the kiss. “Don’t do that.”


	6. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: there's mention of sex here, but nothing explicit, so it should be safe. TW for child abuse mention.  
> I'm throwing as many chapters out as I can because the semester has begun and I want to get the story out there asap.

                The spaceport was cramped, bustling with beings of all races, every sight and smell Hux could imagine in the entire galaxy was within arm’s reach.

                “Is there something you’ve always wanted?” Czeska said quietly, leaning closer to him. Hux looked around, swallowing hard. It was overwhelming, to say the least. Hux slipped his hand into hers, avoiding the obvious, uncomfortable and cliché ‘ _you’_ that he wanted to say. He knew what she meant.

                “Let’s start off with the basics.” He said from behind the respirator, looking around the crowd. It felt strange to be among so many people and remain unrecognized, to not have people stopping what they were doing and giving him a salute, or at least a furtive, fearful glance.  

                His entire life he’d been treated with a forced, guarded sense of respect. One that was compulsory, demanded from those whom he outranked…

                But now, he could slip from stall to stall, unhindered and unnoticed. There was a vague sense of loss with this, but also a sense of liberation. He didn’t have to perform for them, to keep up the façade.

                He could be the person his father so loathed, had so desperately and hatefully tried to drive from him with words and fists and belts.

                He could be kind, gentle boy that had so quickly fallen in love with Czeska’s compassion.

                “It’ll be a bit before the water has fully cycled through and refilled.” Czeska checked her comm pad, setting an alarm. “I guess there’s a botanical garden here. Would you like to see that?”

                Hux, in all honestly, didn’t care about the garden. He’d seen several in his lifetime, and they had all been the same. But there was a tone in Czeska’s voice that suggested she’d like nothing more than to take him, and he couldn’t deny making her happy.

                Maybe it would be some semblance of a date, something he’d never had the opportunity to enjoy.

                They stocked up on supplies first, returning to the ship with a few crates and boxes of concentrates and powders, as well as a small box of fresh produce imported from planets all around the Mid Rim. 

                “Look.” Czeska teased. “Jogan fruit, just for you.” She picked up the purple fruit and tossed it to him playfully.

                Hux caught it, almost sneering at the tart fruit in his hands. He hated Jogan fruit. It reminded him too much of Arkanus.

                “Put it over there.” She pointed to a refrigeration unit to his left. “I won’t make you eat it, I’m just messing with you.”

                He knew she wouldn’t make him do it. She wouldn’t make him do anything he didn’t want to do. But there was still a part of him that took her seriously at times. He knew he’d need to fix that, but it would come with time, and Czeska seemed to have an endless supply of patience.

                He wondered if he could ever become the man she though he could be…

                _“You can’t.”_ A quiet voice of doubt called from the back of his head, growing into a voice theat sounded jarringly like his father. “ _You’ll never be anything more than a weak-willed pathetic boy. She’ll never love you, and you’ll never be worthy of loving…”_

                Hux felt his fingers flex impulsively, piercing the tender flesh of the fruit.  Czeska turned around, one eyebrow raised.

                “Armitage, are you all right?”

                “I’m _fine._ ” He seethed, breathing through his nose to keep his anger in check as he threw the remains of the fruit in the trash. Czeska rolled her lip between her teeth and said nothing, perhaps sensing his agitation.

                He couldn’t let that self-doubt come creeping in now. Not after everything…

                _Not after she’d stood up to Kylo god-damned Ren for him._

                “I need…to sit down.” Hux said after a moment, his chest feeling tight. Czeska looked up from the crate she was unpacking, her brow furrowed.

                “Would you like me to leave you alone for a bit?”

                Hux exhaled, trying to catch the breath that was coming up short in his chest. He stripped the respirator off, letting it fall to the floor as he sat down at the table, running his hands through his hair.

                “No…stay. Please. If you want, that is…” The words fell out of his mouth clumsily. It was more difficult than he thought to mirror her compassion.

Czeska nodded, scooting a box closer with her foot and casting him a concerned glance.

                 He exhaled finally, feeling the desperation welling up in his throat. She crossed the room, kneeling before him at the small table.

                “What’s wrong?” She took his gloved hands, clasping them tightly in her own. “Oh, my darling…”

                There was nothing but empathy and confusion in her eyes, mixed with what Hux could only hope was love.

                Could it be? It seemed too much to hope for, and far more htna he deserved

                “ _Pitiful.”_ The voice of doubt called. _“What a pitiful, weak man.”_

He leaned forward, pulling her close and inhaling the scent of her hair, feeling an unfamiliar sting come into his eyes.

In a moment, she was beside him in the chair, her arms around his neck as she kissed him, gently at first, but with growing fervor as tears began to fall from his eyes.

“I’m not leaving you.” She said, her lips catching on his tears, kissing swollen eyelids. “Only if you wake up one day and decide you hate me.”

He inhaled sharply, looking up at her, trying hard not to wipe away the intricate makeup she’d painted on him hours before.

“My father…” He choked, his voice shuddering in his throat. He felt he owed her an explanation if nothing else.

“I know.” She said, cupping his cheek. “You don’t have to talk about him unless you want to…”

“How?” He furrowed his brow, looking at her mouth again. It was so plump, so full of kisses just waiting to be given.

Panic was filling him again; she had promised to stay out of his head, but perhaps she’d pried?

“When you sleep…you talk…” She said softly, running her fingers through his hair. “You…it’s clear you don’t have the best memories of him. But for what it’s worth, he’s wrong, Armitage. You’re not weak, you’re not useless…”

Hux fought back a fresh wave of tears, pulling her closer.

                This was not the side of him he wanted her to see, but it seemed to be the side of him she saw regardless.

And somehow she still accepted him. All sides of him. The broken, abused side, left raw by his father, the jealous, petty and cruel first Order Officer…the man laid open and raped by his rival, the shaking, submissive man in the hallway, made weak by her tongue…

She saw it all, and here she was, cool hands easing his forehead, her lips kissing away tears.  

They sat in silence, side by side for a little while, her arm around him to calm him down.

He couldn’t help but feel a burning humiliation inside him at the fact that he’d actually cried in front of her.

Perhaps sensing his discomfort, she grabbed him, pulling him in for a deep kiss. She knew how to tilt her head just so, her tongue eagerly pressing against his as she put her weight into it.

Hux opened his mouth, letting her invade him, his heart stirring almost painfully in his chest. He couldn’t help but feel that same stirring in his stomach has he had earlier.

After a moment, she pulled away, a bit of his makeup smudged on her face.

“What was that for?” He breathed, his mouth hanging open. _God damn, he wanted more…_

“For existing.” She said, kissing him again. This time the kiss was more reserved, chaste. _Teasing. “_ For being an intelligent, wonderful… _beautiful_.”

There was something unsaid behind her eyes; an overwhelming expression of desire paired with gentleness.

“You’ve ruined my makeup.” He breathed, his hand falling on the small of her back. She pulled away, a playful smile tugging at the dimples in her cheeks, her free hand fisting in his hair and pulling his head back, exposing the tender, pale flesh of his throat.

“Accidents happen.” She said, raking her teeth across his adams apple. Hux shivered beneath her, reaching down and letting his hand run across the firm swell of her ass, giving it a light slap.

She pulled his hair harder and he felt his pants tighten almost immediately. Damnit, he loved to push her because unlike others in the past, _she pushed back_. She wasn’t afraid of him.

“You shouldn’t hit people.” She teased, shifting her hips against his. A low groan escaped his throat and he felt her leaving a trail of bright red marks from his collarbone to his jaw.

“What are you going to do about it?” He gasped, letting a slight smile crack his features. She shifted hard against him, mirroring his smile as she brought her hips against him again, shifting in a slow, tortuous motion. He shivered beneath her, closing his eyes and exhaling.

“So cruel…” Hux moaned, his teeth clenched. Already, dampness had seeped through the front of his pants, his erection aching as is strained against fabric.

Needless to say, they never made it to the botanical gardens.

 

xXx

 

                Hux rolled over, his legs tangled in the blankets, bare skin feeling cool in the dimmed lights of the sleeping quarters. His mind was still numb from the sex, his body aching sweetly from bruises and bite marks.

                Czeska had wasted no time in claiming him as her own; branding him with her lips and teeth and fingernails. He had returned the favor, leaving his own trail of kisses and bites down her neck and between her thighs.

                Reaching out with a groan, he found the bed beside him empty, the blankets long gone cold. It took him a moment for his brain to process as he sat up, looking around the room blearily.

                There was no sign of Czeska in the room, so he stood, wrapping a blanket around himself as he made his way through the ship. His senses were acutely aware of every movement in the shadow, every soft and distant ‘clang’ the engines made and the hum of the air circulator.

                He found her, after a while, sitting cross-legged in the cockpit, her dark eyes staring out across the infinite space before her. Her hair fell softly across the wide cowl of her shirt, creating an almost-halo-like glow in the dim lights.

                “You’re awake?”

                Hux reached out, wrapping his arm around her forehead and kissing the top of her head before sitting down in the copilot’s seat.

                “When did we leave Myteranor?” He asked, squaring his shoulders and running his hand across his chin. He was going to need to shave soon.

                “About two hours ago.” She looked at him sideways with a soft smile. “I seem to have worn you out, so I let you sleep.”

                Hux didn’t say anything, following her eyes across the vast expanse before them. A selfish part of him had wished that she would have come back to bed after she was done with navigation; there had been something that felt terribly cold and impersonal about waking up alone.

                In the silence, she reached over, putting her hand on his knee and giving it a soft squeeze.

                “You’re upset?”

                “I didn’t say I was…” Hux said, pulling the blanket closer around himself. Maybe he was upset, but he couldn’t quite justify it to himself.

                Part of it, he felt, was an immaturity. Some kind of foreign emotional expectation he’d grown to have of her. He couldn’t shake how detached it had felt to be left alone in the bed like that, especially after such…jarring intimacy.

                Maybe he was wrong to have developed an emotional attachment to her at the level he had. Maybe all along, he had misread the small acts of kindness and intimacy and in the end she was only so sweet to him because it filled her own needs.

                Hux sat in the chair, elbow on the armrest as he contemplated in silence, trying to fight the bitterness and doubt that seemed to be filling him faster than he could stop it.

                 He felt the sting coming back to his eyes at the thought of being ‘unlovable’, like his father had said time and time again. He didn’t want to cry here, not in front of her, not again. He didn’t want her to keep seeing that weakness.

                Czeska stood up and for a moment and he thought she was leaving, but instead, she put her arms around his shoulders from behind, her lips pressing softly against the back of his neck.

                “I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you woke up.” She said softly, petting his hair, nuzzling into the warmth. “I wanted to be. I wanted nothing more than to lay there in your arms for hours.”

                Hux sat for a moment, regaining his composure as he inhaled deeply. He wasn’t sure if he should believe her, but he certainly wanted to.               

                She knelt beside him, taking his hands in hers and kissing his wrist. “You need to start telling me when you’re upset, when I’ve hurt you. I understand why you don’t, but I want you to know you’re safe to say whatever you want here.”

                Hux stared down at her, feeling his lip begin to tremble on its own volition. He swore inwardly as he clenched his jaw, looking away as if to focus on the stars outside the viewport.

                “I didn’t say I was upset.” He repeated. Czeska nodded, rising to her feet and letting go of his hand. He wanted to yell at himself to stop. To just admit to her that he was hurt. Why was it so _hard_?

                Czeska was left looking at him, her eyes veiled and dark. Her uncertainty was almost palpable as her gaze shifted from himself to the exit, and back.

                “Czeska…” His voice croaked, his throat suddenly faced with an unknown obstruction. At first, panic filled him; was she choking him? Had he finally pushed her to the edge of her patience?

He looked up at her, his face betraying his terror; No, his body was doing this on his own.

“I’m not…trying to be difficult.” He managed, his tongue seeming to suddenly be both too big and too small for his mouth.

“Armitage…” She leaned down, kissing his cheek, her hand falling softly on his shoulder. “I understand.”

“Do you?” Hux finally regained some command over his body, his panic giving away to anger. Not at her, but at himself more than anything. “Do you understand? Do you know what it’s like to be…to never be good enough? To have your own father cast you aside, tell you… _you’re as thin and useless as a slip of paper_ …”

“I don’t.” Czeska said, sitting back down in the pilot’s chair with a heavy sigh. She reached over, taking his hand in hers, her grip frim but gentle. “I can’t pretend I know what that would be like.”

 Hux could still feel his heart pounding in his ears. He was angry. He wanted to lash out, but he didn’t want to hurt her. He let go of her hand, running his hands over his face as if to wipe away the frustration.

This whole outburst was possibly one of the most embarrassing things to happen to him. He was glad his father was dead, so he could never see him like this.

_Weak, pathetic._

Armitage sat back in the chair, looking at the woman before him, memorizing her face in the dim light. She was listening, attentive. Even her body language was open, almost pleading for him to communicate.

He let his shoulders fall, defeated as he began to tell her about the abuse he faced as a child. Every word that spilled from his mouth was gilded with the hatred he felt for his father, the rage at his own inadequacy at dealing with it.

Czeska sat in silence, listening attentively. Her eyes were overbright, but she didn’t let her tears fall. He could tell she shared his anger, mourned his pain. Her hand held his gently, her thumb stroking his knuckles whenever things became hard for him to articulate.

There were moments where he had to catch himself, and he would just sit there in the silence, gritting his teeth and breathing carefully through his nose. She’s take his hand in both of hers, raising it to her lips and kissing it softly.

Despite the anger and pain Hux was reliving, he couldn’t help but feel like the raw parts of his nerves had been dropped into a bacta tank; a numbing, sweet relief washing over him.

“Your dad was a dumbass, Armitage.” Czeska said after a prolonged bout of silence, a smile flickering across her features. He could see her cheeks were damp with tears and now he felt guilty for making her cry.

“I’m…” It was jarring, hearing it so bluntly spoken. There was something almost blasphemous about it, but this was, he supposed, Czeska’s way of trying to make him feel better. “Don’t say that.”

“All right. Then, with all due respect, I disagree with your father. And also if he were here I would fight him. Probably. And lose, but it would be worth it.”

Hux felt a slight smile tug at his features as he leaned back on his hand, a snort of amusement escaping his nose.

 

 


	7. Respite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: there's softcore smut at the end, so proceed with caution.

It had been over a month since Hux’s departure from the First Order, and the newness of his freedom was beginning to wear down into a comfortable domesticity. While life with Czeska didn’t have nearly as much structure to it, it had its own set of rituals and routines that the former general was beginning to get the hang of.

Czeska had managed to finally sell the spice to a Cerean smuggler named P’htana they had run into on Bespin. She had been a tall, middle aged woman with the elongated skull common to her race.

To look at her, Hux would never have guessed her to be a smuggler. Every inch of P’htana radiated an elegance and charm that Hux had once only though to come with good breeding. However, she and Czeska knew each other and got along quite well, showing a much less refined side of the older woman.

 The Cerean had taken quite a shine to Hux, expressing mild disappointment that Czeska was unwilling to part with him for a price.

                “Now that that’s out of the way, we can rest a little easier on that front.” Czeska sighed, sitting back in the cockpit and letting her shoulders fall, her entire expression betraying relief. “We still gotta worry about your buddies, though, but I guess we’ll take that as it comes.”

                Hux ran a towel over his face, wiping the makeup off and rearranging his hair as he sat down in the seat beside hers. The brown he had used to tint his hair was fading quickly back to its old copper color, which concerned him, but Czeska seemed happy to see traces of red again.

                “So, what’s our next move?” He asked, leaning forward and inspecting the navigation settings. Czeska sighed, straitening up in her seat and furrowing her brows.

                “I’ll be totally honest, I don’t have a fucking clue. I mean, I don’t have cargo, I don’t have a lead. I’m glad P’htana payed a decent price, because things are going to be a little dry for a while.”

                “Perhaps this is an opportunity to lay low.” Hux said, checking the navigation system again, bringing up a map with his fingertips. “We could find a place without many people…”

                “Or a place with too many. We have a better chance at blending in.”

                “We have a better chance at not being seen, though.” Hux felt a small, self-indulgent tick in the back of his mind. He wanted more alone time with her. Out here, it constantly felt like they were on the run, and even in moments of intimacy, there was a small part of him that couldn’t help but feel terrified that the Order was going to catch up with them.

                “You do have a point. And it might be nice to be able to move around freely.” She said, pulling up a planet’s data on her comm unit.

                “What about Cyphar?” Hux tapped the screen of the navigation, pulling up the coordinates.

                “Yeah, uh, the Cyphari tend to not really like Chiss, so kind of a no-go for me. Something about a guy named Thrawn...you know, totally normal.”

                Hux sighed, cancelling the coordinates and sitting back as Czeska messed around with her comm device. She handed it over to him.

He had not forgotten about the Grand Admiral, but he had a hard time connecting him to Czeska in any way. Their actions, their discipline was totally different. It seemed outlandish that anyone would hold her accountable for Thrawn’s actions.

“What about the Unknown Regions, can’t you go back?”

“Not exactly on the best terms with the Ascendency.” Czeska shrugged. “Though it might work out, they also could sell us out to the Order. They’re like that sometimes.”

“What about your brother?”

“I can’t lead the First Order to him…” She said quietly. “He’s got a wife and kids.”

 “Well, you pick a place, then.” Hux had a hard time keeping the edge out of his voice, but he was growing vaguely irritated. He now realized how little he actually knew about Czeska, and it bothered him.

“Fine.” Czeska punched in some coordinates, sitting back in her chair with a huff. “Las Lagoon. It’s not great, but it’s not a desert or got people who are going to kill us on sight, so there’s that.”

“What exactly did you do back home to get you exiled?”

“I’m not exiled.” Czeska laughed. “They just don’t really approve of my career choice. It’s a ‘bad example’ and all that. Might give people the _wrong idea_ about Chiss.”

Hux felt a slight smile ease his face. “I don’t think it’s the career giving people the wrong idea.”

“Shut your whore mouth.” She scoffed, leaning the chair closer to him. “Or I’ll show you how bad my reputation can get.”

Hux reached over, letting his hand brush against hers. She took it with a smile, raising it to her lips and kissing it softly, placing it against her cheek. Her dark lashes brushed softly against the tender flesh, and Armitage inhaled, letting his façade fall as he smiled softly.

Czeska stood up, stretching slightly before leaning down, her lips brushing against his ear.

“Or I could just keep ruining _your_ reputation.” She whispered.

Hux suppressed a shiver, closing his eyes as he felt himself twitch inside his pants.

 

xXx

                Las Lagoon was a small planet bathed in cerulean blue, appearing to be a good percentage water, with small continents that were covered in a deep green foliage.

                It was mostly undeveloped, but as they touched down on one of the small, rugged islands along the coastlines of one of the sparse continents, Hux noted a small city nestled along the base of one of the snow-capped mountain ranges on the mainland.

                The climate, from what he could glean off of scant data, was cool and damp, with heavy rains that happened fairly frequently, though it didn’t seem as miserable as Arkanus.

                Czeska had piloted them well away from prying eyes, but close enough that if they needed supplies, they could do a run in a day or so, if the weather was right.

                The air was sweet, their lungs aching blissfully as they took in the clean ocean air, shielding their eyes from the bright sun overhead as they sat down in the sand between two craggy, black cliffs.

                Blue-grey water lapped at their feet and they collapsed backwards, eyes staring up into the vast blue sky, speckled by fleeting clouds.

                Hux rolled over in the sand, looking as the woman beside him as she squinted into the sun above, white teeth bared in a joyous smile, her chest heaving a sigh of relief.

                “We’re free…” He exhaled, reaching over and touching the black hair that pooled around her in the sand.

                “For now.” She reached up, pulling his head closer to hers, kissing him softly.

                Hux moaned into her mouth, climbing on top of her and pulling his shirt off. Czeska ran cool fingers down his chest, over his hips, sliding her thumbs into his waistband and tugging ever-so-slightly. Enough to frustrate the former General.

                “I could stare at you for hours…” She breathed, sitting up beneath him and letting her teeth graze across his collarbone, her mouth leaving deep purple bruises over the top of old ones.

                Hux let his eyes flutter, feeling himself stiffen slowly as she breathed against his neck, her fingers tracing over his back.

                “Since the moment I saw you, I was in love.” Czeska sighed softly, pulling away and brushing her fingers along his part, her eyes soft. “I couldn’t help the way I felt. I was so scared.”

                Armitage felt his stomach twist, feeling as though there was nothing beneath him as he looked into her crimson eyes. He didn’t know how to respond, only putting his own pale hand against her face, pressing his forehead against hers.

                “You didn’t seem scared.” Hux tugged at the line of buckles on her belt, his fingers fumbling as he let his lips ghost across her skin. “You seemed like you wanted to sell me off as a slave.”

                “I just wanted to see you tied up.” She teased as he freed her of the belt harness. She shrugged away layers of clothing, leaving her shoulders bare in the bright sunlight. She took his wrist, her fingers running along the porcelain-fine flesh.

                Hux leaned in, letting his mouth move across her neck, down onto her collarbone before dipping between her breasts, his hand reaching up idly and caressing one dark nipple before giving her breast a slight squeeze. “You can tie me up any time…”

                “God, you’re such a slut…” She breathed, sliding her hand down the back of his pants, giving his ass a firm squeeze to return the sensation.

                “You’re one to talk…” he muttered, his lips brushing across her chest, his tongue pressing flat against the other nipple. Czeska let out a soft gasp, shifting underneath him as he let his tongue ply against her skin. “So delicious…”

                “Incorrigible…”

                “Insolent…” He chuckled, pulling away and letting their mouths meet softly, one hand on her waist as he reached up, brushing his hand over her hair. He wanted to tell her he loved her, but the word stuck in his throat, so he just sat on her lap, his hand on her face, memorizing her features.

              


	8. Freedom

 Hux rolled over, the dim light of the sleeping quarters casting soft shadows through the room. Czeska was nestled beside him, her chest rising and falling softly, one arm slung over his chest.

                Carefully and quietly, Hux rose to his feet, a nagging feeling rising in the back of his brain. Something felt off, though he couldn’t quite identify what.

                He made his way to the refresher, relieving himself before returning, nagging panic still resounding. Straining carefully in the darkness, he listened hard, catching a soft beeping emanating from within one of the storage lockers near the door.

                A small, familiar sound radiated as he opened the door, seeing his greatcoat neatly hung on a rack, his uniform exactly where he had left it after he and Czeska had found him some civilian clothes near Myteranor.

                That dread that once filled him shifted quickly into a full blown panic as he frantically began to dig through the pockets of his uniform, throwing clothes across the room frantically.

                _The data pad…_

                “Armitage?” He heard Czeska’s voice, thick with sleep, call out. He didn’t look back, sweat beading on his brow as he finally recovered the data pad from the pocket of his greatcoat. His hands shook as he looked down at the device in his hand, looking back up at Czeska.

                “What is that? Hux?” She scrambled from the bed, brows knit in confusion. “Is that a data pad?”

                _“Yes…”_ He breathed. “Yes, it is. Czeska, I’m so sorry…”

                “Sorry? Armitage, sorry for what? What’s going on?”

                “It’s been in my pocket the entire time. I’d forgotten until I heard the battery dying…”

                “ _Armitage_ …”

                “It’s been my fault…this whole time, they’ve been tracking us…” He sat down on the bed, his own brows knit in horror, passing a hand over his face as he tried to coax his brain into functioning.

                “My cloaking system should have blocked it out.” Czeska said, taking the device from him and inspecting it. He could tell by her tone that she didn’t quite believe her own words.

                Czeska turned the data pad over in her hands, lifting it and looking at it from every angle.

Hux’s chest tightened. It felt like he was going to pass out, his mind reeling.

                “Lie down love, I’m going to fix this, all right? I’m going to fix everything.” She leaned over, kissing his temple.

                “How? Czeska, how? You’ve been cleaning up my messes since the beginning of this. I can’t keep relying on you to do it.” Hux rose to his feet, running his hands through his hair as he paced back and forth. “What am I going to do? What am I going to do when you’re not around anymore?”

                “When I’m not around?” Czeska repeated, setting the pad down. “Are you planning on me ‘not being around’?”

                “You know what I mean.” Hux said, taking the data pad. “I feel like I can’t live without you, but someday…someday something is going to happen and you won’t be there anymore. I have to learn to take care of myself, isn’t that what you’ve been trying to get me to do?”

                Czeska was quiet, clutching the blanket from the bed to her chest, her eyes looking lost, her face falling into an unreadable expression that edged on sadness. “Yes…”

                Heart hammering against his ribcage, Hux leaned down, stealing a kiss before he charged out the door and into the night.

The cool night air bit at his pale skin, his eyes straining through the darkness. A steady rain had begun to fall earlier in the night, coming in from the ocean that surrounded them.

                The sharp rocks from the cliffs cut at his feet as he grabbed blindly in the darkness, his fingers finally gaining purchase of a sizeable rock.

                Will all his strength, he smashed the device, watching as it sparked beneath his blows, pouring all his rage and hatred of his past life into crushing it beneath the rock.

                He thought of his father, bringing the rock down, the sharp, volcanic edges cutting his hands.

                He was strong, he knew now. He was intelligent, he had the capacity for kindness. His father had been wrong. There was something to be gained with letting himself be compassionate.

Gritting his teeth, he brought the rock down again and again, letting an animalistic rage consume him, so contrary to the new identity he had given himself. 

                This was it; this was that sweet liberation he’d always craved. He was free to make choices now.

                He believed in himself.

                Rising, shaking, to his feet, he spat on the broken remains, kicking with rain-slicked, bloody feet.

                “Armitage…” Hux turned, seeing Czeska, now fully dressed and climbing the rise of the cliff. “You’re going to get sick, come back inside.”

                “I’ve done it Czeska.” He said, his voice shaking at he dropped the rock with a sharp ‘crack’. “I’ve done it. It’s over.”

                Czeska shined a light on the remains of the device, her mouth hanging open with surprise.

                “You have…certainly done something.” She was at a loss for words, her expression confused. Hux took three steps over, taking her about the waist and lifting her in the air, the rain making her long black hair stick to his skin as he spun her in his arms. 

                Dropping the light, she leaned down and kissed him fully, sighing happily as he pulled away. A grin spread across his features. “I’ve done it.”

                “Let’s get you inside, you dork.” She laughed, draping a blanket across his shoulders. Hux winced, the rocks stinging his feet as they made their way back to the ship in the rain, the thick foliage obscuring their vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter this go around. I'm gonna upload the rest over the weekend.


	9. The Dividing Line

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw for rape and violence in this chapter

Even though Hux had demolished the data pad, he still couldn’t shake that fear that had seized him, though there was a tremendous relief that filled his heart as he clung to Czeska’s hand in the dark as she helped him pick his way across the forest floor.

                Rounding a large, vine-clad tree, Hux saw the root of his fears exposed in the soft light radiated by the _Sabaton’_ s idle lights.

                “Stormtroopers…” Hux breathed, pulling Czeska close to him as he ducked behind the tree, draping the blanket over them both. Czeska’s face hardened and she put her arm around his waist.

                “We need to get out of here.” She breathed. “Your feet, though…”

                Hux didn’t say a word, taking her hand as they crept quietly through the brush and ferns. Every step felt like glass cutting his feet, sending sharp pains up his legs.

                They broke into a run once they reached the beach, the ocean tossing violently in the storm. Far offshore, an electrical storm was beginning to gather, flashing blue across the horizon.

                “What are we going to do?” Czeska wiped the rain from her brow, turning to look at him. “I’ve made a mistake, we should have landed on the mainland…we’re trapped here. Hux, I’m so sorry.”

                Hux hated the fear in her voice, the quiver as she looked at him with panic in her eyes, their hands slick with rain as the seawater lapped at their feet.

                “You didn’t know.”

                There was a shout from behind them and Hux turned, his hair clinging to his forehead as dozens of men in white armor began to storm the beach behind them.

                Pushing him behind her, Czeska stood in between Hux and the troopers as they leveled their blasters at the couple.

                “Czeska, no!” Hux slipped as the saltwater waves nipped at his abused feet.

                She reached towards her belt, silver flashing in the pale light as Hux saw a dark figure stepping between the Stormtroopers, wind licking at the layers of dark fabric.

                “General Hux, I have finally found you.” The familiar, vocoded voice cut through the sound of the waves, making the redhead’s stomach drop.

                “Stay behind me, Armitage.” He could see the shine of a small blaster in her hand.

                “Czeska, please. Now isn’t the time…”

                “We have to do something.”

                Instinctively, Hux stepped backwards, the waves now up to his shins. He clung to her desperately, the waves threatening to sweep them both away.

                Perhaps it would have been best if he let them?  

                “You.” Kylo called out, his hand extended towards them, his voice sounding soft, sympathetic. Hux knew it was a trap. “You’re just like the girl.”

                “Czeska…” Hux breathed, struggling to maintain his footing.

                “What girl?” Czeska hissed, grabbing Hux by the arm and pulling him closer, keeping her arm around him to prevent them both from getting pulled away by the waves. Tears were in Hux’s eyes by now, the saltwater stinging the cuts on his feet.

                Kylo advanced on them, the Stormtroopers standing perfectly still as the Sith approached the shoreline where the couple clung to one another.

                “Come with me.” Kylo said calmly, his hand outstretched towards them.

                “Eat my ass.” Czeska shouted, leveling the blaster at his head. “I’ll fucking kill you, you son of a bitch.”

                “I am only offering friendship.”

                “Don’t come any closer.” Czeska’s voice was shaking and Hux realized she was fighting, her lips trembling as she struggled for air. “I’ll kill you.”

                “You won’t kill me.” The waves were now licking the toes of Kylos boots softly as he maintained his steady course towards them. Hux knew that tactic all too well; he was trying to break into her mind, bend her to his will.

                Czeska’s hands shook, the blaster falling into the water at her feet. Kylo was close now, close enough to touch them. Hux wanted to yell out in horror and pain, memories of the other man flooding his senses

                Memories of mind control, of being made to do filthy things at the other man’s beckon call, humiliating himself for the other man’s amusement and pleasure…

                Fighting the rising panic inside, Hux’s entire body shook as he threw his full weight against Czeska, pinning her into the wet sand beneath them. He could feel Ren inside his head, enjoying making Hux force the woman he loved face-down into the wet sand.

                Czeska choked, spitting sand out as Hux’s hands pinned her wrists above her head.

                “You have to fight it…” She gasped as the waves swept over her. “You’re stronger than that, Armitage.”

                “I should make you kill her.” Kylo hissed lowly, his voice taking on a deadly edge of amusement. “How satisfying that would be…to break you both completely

 

                xXx

                Hux’s chest felt tight with dread as he was held firmly in place, his wrists clasped firmly above his head. His lithe body was exposed in the cold, harsh lights of the _Finalizer_ , leaving him accessible to whatever abuse dictated Kylo’s whim.

                He had been restrained on that table for hours, his knees nearly up to his chest, his battered feet barely holding his weight on the metal stirrups. His body had been brutalized in nearly every way Kylo could imagine, short of killing him.

                Armitage felt raw on the inside, both physically and emotionally. He didn’t know where Kylo had taken Czeska, but his mind could only conjure the worst.

                It seemed likely that Kylo would keep her alive, long enough at least for Snoke to decide what to do with her. The same went for Hux himself. Kylo seemed thoroughly convinced Hux had been lured away in much in the same way the brunet could control people’s minds and bodies.

                The same way he’d forced Hux to hold Czeska down on the beach, the woman nearly drowning in the waves as they washed over the two. She had fought hard, using the Force to try to break Kylo’s grasp of them. But in the end, she’d held back, not wanting to hurt Hux.

                It was only when Hux began to weep, begging Ren to stop that the Stormtroopers were allowed to advance and arrest the woman.

                Hux was left shivering in the beach as they marched her off, staring at his own empty hands, the rain and waves falling around him.

                “You’re weak.” Ren’s voice was thick, and the taller man pulled his helmet off, running his fingers through his dark hair. “Look at how pathetic she’s made you, turned you into nothing more than a degenerate, sobbing slut.”

                The words rang in Hux’s ears, leaving a bitter taste in his mouth.

                The redhead tugged again at the restraints, shifting his bodyweight to ease the tension in his shoulders, his insides twisting. It felt like Kylo had somehow displaced something important in there, and at this point, it wouldn’t have surprised him.

                The door opened with a hiss and Hux froze, his green eyes fixed on the tall figure who entered. Walking three feet behind him, to Hux’s surprise and dismay, was Czeska.

                He had never seen her face like that before; her eyes were cold, dead, her mouth unsmiling. Her movements were stiff and she barely looked at Hux as the door closed behind them.

                Armitage’s mouth went dry, his back arching against the table. He wished she would look at him, even a glance. Even the briefest of eye contact would be like balm on his wounds.

                Nothing.

                “Snoke and I have spoken about your fate.” Kylo said, his voice dripping with distain and amusement, his gloved hand reaching out and touching Hux’s face in a way that made the redhead’s stomach twist.

                It felt like a gross mockery of the way Czeska had once cradled his face, the other man’s thumb moving across the rise of his cheekbone.

                “If you…beg prettily, we won’t entirely strip you of your rank.” Kylo purred, stepping close in between Hux’s spread legs. “Especially since you brought a new Force adept to us…”

                Hux looked over at Czeska, begging internally for some sign that Kylo was lying, but her face remained impassive, as if she were simply an empty husk.

                “The deal was, I join you, and he retains his former position.” Czeska said suddenly, her voice flat and toneless.

                “The deal?” Kylo turned, his face shifting rapidly from an expression of care to a cruel sneer. “The deal? You think you can make a _deal_ in your position?”

                Hux braced himself, feeling the anger rise in the other man, a nearly tangible force. One gloved hand swung freely, colliding with one of the view screens that lined the room.

 It arced as the glass caved inward, leaving wires and circuits exposed.

                “YOU DON’T GET TO MAKE THAT DESCISION.” Kylo was in Czeska’s face, the woman flinching back, narrowing her eyes as he yelled. “YOU DON’T GET A DEAL. HE DOESN’T GET A DEAL.”

                He pointed at Hux, who took a deep breath, fear sweeping over him.

                Czeska was quiet as Kylo turned back to Hux, his dark eyes softening as his hand moved up the former Generals’ slender side, fingers tracing bruises and scratches and cuts from earlier abuse. Hux exhaled through his nose, his body trembling beneath the other man’s touch.

                He hated that his body liked it, jerking and responding to the other man’s light touches.

                “So pretty, don’t you agree?” Kylo mused, looking over at Czeska for a moment, a soft expression behind his eyes. He reached out and took her hand, moving her fingers across Hux’s stomach.

                Hux shifted, his ears flushing at his growing erection. Kylo watched carefully as he led Czeska’s hand across his body, his fingers forming tight bruises in her wrists. Hux wasn’t sure if he imagined it, but he saw her lips twitch, her eyes meeting his for just a moment.

 “Pretty little slut, isn’t he?” Kylo purred, dropping her hand before turning back to the redhead. “And what a slut he is. But did you know… _he’s mine_.”

                The back of Kylo’s gloved hand collided with Hux’s face, causing the redhead to gasp, shivering at the impact. He’d bit his tongue to keep from crying out in pain, the coppery taste of blood filling his mouth.

                Taking opportunity in the chaos, Hux saw Czeska move, shouldering into Kylo’s side, her hands desperately grabbing at the other man’s waist in a desperate attempt to tackle the brunet.  

                At the same time, Hux felt the restraints release, his body falling to the floor as Kylo and Czeska fought for dominance.

                “I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU IF YOU TOUCH HIM AGAIN.” The sheer hatred and Czeska’s voice caused Hux to back away, his brows knit in shock. “Armitage, get out of here!”

                Hux scrambled backwards, his body screaming as it was suddenly granted freedom.

                There was a flash of crimson and crackle through the air as Kylo’s lightsaber activated, the taller man pressing it closer to Czeska while she gripped his wrist tightly, maintaining a degree of control.

                “Armitage! Run, dumbass! _Please!”_ Czeska’s voice cracked with fear as she turned to look at the redhead briefly. That fleeting moment of distraction was all Kylo Ren needed.

                Somehow, Hux saw it happen in slow motion as Czeska’s hand slipped from around Kylo’s wrist, the woman finally losing out in the battle for power.

 In a split second, the entire room was scented with the stench of burning hair and flesh, a ghastly scream filling the air.

 


	10. Shards of Love

“PLEASE!” Hux choked, lurching forward until he was between the two, grapping Czeska in his arms and dragging her out of the way of the blade.

 Half of Czeska’s face was viciously singed. Charred flesh hung away, exposing muscle and what Hux could only assume was bone. There wasn’t much blood: the wound had been instantly cauterized, which Hux was thankful for. She wouldn’t die immediately.

                “Just stop, Czeska, just stop, it’s not worth it.”

                Czeska was shaking in anger and horror, her fingers grasping Hux’s shoulder as her breath came out ragged. He was afraid that if she moved too much, what was left of her eye would fall out of its socket.

 “Please, I’ll do anything you want. Just don’t kill her.” Hux turned to Kylo. “I’ll do _anything_.”

                Kylo pulled away, his own face a perfect mask of horror as he finally looked at the damage he had done to the woman. It was like, for a brief moment, the man was rational, sobered by his actions.

                He deactivated the lightsaber, dropping it to the floor as if it had shocked him. Czeska scooted backward, clutching the remains of her face, her remaining eye wide in shock. Hux knew she was in bad shape, her blue skin pale as she registered the damage.

                Without warning, the woman struck out, knocking Kylo backwards with her fist. In a second, she was on top of him, pummeling him with her full strength.

                “Czeska, please!”

                Kylo’s slender fingers grasped at her, his fingers closing around her throat as he made a sound like a wounded animal, teeth bared in rage.

                Hux grabbed Czeska, yanking her backwards off of the other man before either of them could do any further damage.

                “You fucking…” Czeska spun around, her fist colliding with Hux’s face with a sharp cracking noise. Tears sprang into the redhead’s eyes and he stepped back, looking up at her with shock as crimson began to pour from his broken nose.

                “Oh…my love…” She breathed, backing away in horror. “I’m so sorry…”

                Kylo rose to his feet, anger tangible though his face was calm.

                “Run.” Hux’s voice cracked as he himself backed away, painfully aware of his own vulnerability. “Just _LEAVE_.”

                Without hesitation, she disappeared, her footfalls echoing down the hallway. Hux wanted to run after her, but he was rooted to the spot, shaking with fear and anger, blood dripping from his nose.

                Kylo stood, a slow smile playing across his long features as he grabbed Hux by the face, bearing down on the shorter man.

                “Do you see now? How fast she turned on you? How she gladly _abandoned_ you?” Kylo’s voice was a low purr in Hux’s ear. He felt his body respond against his will as Kylo took his jaw between his fingers, forcing his head upwards. “You really are hopeless…”

                With a sudden force, Kylo pushed Hux backwards, the redhead stumbling before falling to the floor.

                “Get yourself cleaned up and dressed.” Kylo sneered, wiping his gloved hand on his robes dismissively. “I will see you on the bridge.”

xXx

                Hux walked quickly, despite the pain that raked through his spine. He tried to ignore the looks of confusion from fellow officers as he passed, furtive whispers passed behind hands.

                They thought he couldn’t hear them, but it was amazing what the human body did to ones senses when fighting off excruciating pain.

                He arrived on the bridge, seeing Kylo silhouetted on the platform. A hushed whisper ran through the room, but Hux cast the technicians each a hardened look, feeling his face fall into the same angry expression he’d worn before his little ‘vacation’.

                “It took her longer than anticipated.” Kylo said, the vocoder in his helmet hiding the amusement in his voice as he stepped to the side, gesturing for Hux to step into position to see what was happening outside the viewport.

                The _Sabaton_ was caught in the Finalizer’s tractor beam, the A-24 shivering as its engines kicked into overdrive to try to escape the grasp of the larger ship.

                “See her exercise in futility.” Kylo purred, one hand falling on Hux’s shoulder, gloved fingers squeezing painfully as he raised his other arm, waving to an officer on the platform below. “Just like yours.”

                The officer nodded, punching in a set of commands. Hux’s stomach tightened. He knew that code.

                He wanted to yell, to tackle Kylo in much the same way that Czeska had earlier, but he found his body rigid, rooted to the spot.

                “This is for your own good, you know.” Kylo whispered. “No more _distractions_.”

                Armitage’s voice was locked in his throat, his teeth gritted, lips pulling back in a sneer.

A beam of light shot out from the star destroyer’s gun turret and Hux stood, perfectly silent and still as the bridge lit up.  

                There was no noise. It was absolutely, maddeningly silent as white light bloomed beyond the screen, punctuated by a hail of shrapnel, pieces of the _Sabaton_ floating slowly away from the quickly receding ball of flame.

                No one on the bridge spoke, no one even dared a glance at him.

                A scream locked in Hux’s throat, Kylo forcing a wave of calm over the redhead, who was fighting back the impulse to throttle the younger man, his body going numb with despair and grief.

                _And rage._

                “And that’s that.” Kylo said simply. “That’s all that is needed of you, General. Now go back to your quarters and finish out your _medical leave_.”

                Hux’s body shook as it moved on his own, blinking back the tears that threatened his eyes. Kylo’s hold over him lasted until Hux entered his rooms, locking the door behind him before falling to his knees.

                Hux didn’t really weep or wail so much as tears simply fell freely from his eyes as he sat in absolute silence, his fingers gripping the rough carpeting that covered the floor.

                His stomach roiled as his hatred for Kylo blossomed anew, his limbs shaking with pain and grief; he was tired, physically, emotionally, his soul feeling raw.

Raising shaking hands, he ran his fingers through his hair, tipping back and forth lightly.

                “What am I going to do…” he whispered, his throat hitching violently. “What the fuck am I going to do?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be the end, full stop. Like I said, everything is already written, I'm just polishing.   
> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	11. Love Me To The End

 

                In the months that followed, Kylo had somehow managed to convince Snoke that Hux had been a hostage, citing the so-called brutality Czeska had exhibited towards him in the holding cell where Hux had been tortured.

                But Hux, despite retaining his title as ‘General’, had been reduced to nothing more than a frippery aboard the ship. He held no actual power, was given little security clearance, not even a weapon.

                He was purely ornamental now, reduced to nothing more than a toy. He’d only give the orders he’d been told to give, like a trained animal.

This was, Hux was certain, yet another way for Kylo to assert his power over the General, to mock and degrade him further.

                His chest was tight as he clenched his fingers against his desk, holding back the emotion that threatened to spill out of him.

 He sat in absolute silence, his mouth back in its usual bitter set as he thought about the woman who had given him a taste of freedom.

                He didn’t blame her for striking him, though he could tell by the look on her face, she had been horrified by the act.

He wished he could have grabbed her and told her it was all right, to have escaped with her, even if it meant dying with her aboard the _Sabaton_.       

And now, every time he looked in the mirror at his nose, now just ever-so-slightly off center, he was reminded of her, of that final act between them. He wished it hadn’t been an act of violence.  

                Hux was tired of crying, tired of the combination of numbness and rawness that had seemed to consume his existence. He wanted to be the man she knew he could be, but here it didn’t seem like he could, his entire body numb with grief.

                 A soft beeping punctuated his contemplation, and Armitage shoved the data pad away from him violently, ignoring the incoming transmission.

That same trapped feeling that had gotten him into this mess was rising in his chest once again.

                He stood, leaning back against the desk with crossed arms, frowning as he looked out across his room at the unmade bed. A small act of defiant victory.

                If he closed his eyes, he swore he could feel the weight of Czeska’s hand in his, her lips pressing softly against his cheek.

                Sometimes he’d dream of her, though he couldn’t tell if this was balm or salt on the wound of her absence. His brain couldn’t quite pick out what her face looked like anymore: sometimes it was as it was when he first fully saw it, but on other nights, there was nothing on the side of her face save for a charred, black mass of skin.

                Those nights were the worst. He’d wake up shaking, in a cold sweat, his bed empty save for himself. There was no comfort to be had in these moments, so Hux had taken to drinking Corellian liquor to stave off his sorrows.

                Hux was ripped from his thoughts as the entire ship gave a groan, lurching sideways. The lights flickered momentarily and then emergency sirens began to scream.

                Hux opened the door, watching two officers race past as a cool, female voice came over the speakers.

                “All personnel to their stations, we are under attack. Resistance fighters incoming.”

Another loud crash, and the star destroyer gave a shuddering moan.

                “All personnel to their stations.”

                “General Hux, sir!”

Hux turned, knitting his brow at the young officer that approached. “Sir, evacuation vessels are being prepared for the officers.”

The young main raised his hand in salute and Hux waved him off dismissively, returning to grab his greatcoat before descending into the hangar.

Below him, there was utter chaos; black-clad offers rushing to evacuation vessels, Stormtroopers carting large portions of data storage onto ships.

Armitage clutched the railing, a sudden calm washing over him as he watched the below unfold.

“General Hux, sir, aren’t you going to evacuate?” A harried looking young officer, with her arms full of external storage, gave him a worried look. “Sir?”

“Make sure the others get to their ships first.” He said calmly, waving her off. He closed his eyes, fighting back a serene smile. He returned briefly to his quarters to retrieve a bottle of the Corellian liquor before as he went up to the bridge to watch the battle.

He could understand now, why everyone was so panicked; three dreadnaughts had appeared, surrounded by auxiliary ships, as well as fighters.

TIE fighters worked to intercept the unwanted visitors, but Hux could tell, even now, that the battle was already lost.

Sitting back in the empty command chair, he poured himself a glass of the bittersweet liquid as he watched in silence as the Resistance forces took over the ship.

He could only hope that everyone important had been evacuated safely.

Over the sounds of the ships sirens, he could hear the Resistance forces docking, the sound of blaster fire coming closer with each second that passed, but he remained unmoving, the half-empty glass clutched in his pale fingers.

Hux wasn’t entirely sure what he was going to do when the fight caught up to him, but he also wasn’t sure he cared at this point. Perhaps it was his time.

He wasn’t afraid anymore, he’d done his best, gotten as far as he could. There was no shame in that. He couldn’t’ explain where this feeling had come from. On any other day of the week, he would have evacuated with the rest of the officers.

But today was different.

The door behind him opened, flooding the darkened bridge with white light. Hux dug his fingers into the vinyl of the chair as several sets of footsteps came towards him. His heart hammered against his chest, his stomach twisting, though he remained calm, draining the last of his liquor.

“Put your hands up, stand up and turn around slowly.” The click of the blaster told Hux that the soldier was prepared to fire if Hux didn’t comply. This kid was about to get a big promotion on the Resistance end.

Without a word, Hux rose to his feet, lifting his chin proudly as he turned to face defeat. If he had to die, he may as well do it standing tall.

That would, no doubt, make Czeska proud. He could practically hear her calling his name in the back of his head, seeking him out in that place among the stars.

 If there was, in fact, an afterlife, he was ready to join her.

Other Resistance soldiers began pouring in, surrounding him on all sides as Hux’s eyes grew accustomed to the bright backlight that cast a narrow beam across the bridge.

Hux looked at each of the soldiers in turn, that damned serenity sweeping over him as he memorized the diverse cast of faces; some human, some alien. They all wore similar uniforms of khaki brown, some wearing helmets with visors.

“Private Ulivte, confirm the target.” The commander barked, glancing back at the door as another figure joined them, lagging behind the others just a little.

                “It’s him.” The private’s voice was maddeningly familiar, making Hux’s stomach drop and his knees weak. _It couldn’t be…_      

                Tears immediately sprang to his eyes at the woman stepped forward, her long black hair coiled in a neat bun at the nape of her neck. Her face was almost unrecognizable on one side, blue flesh tinted lavender with thick scar tissue. An eyepatch had been implanted into her skin, giving her an uncharacteristically harsh look, but her lips were still the same, still full of kisses and promises.

                Czeska stood before him, both hands nervously clutching a blaster rifle, looking him up and down as a slight smile twisted her lips.

                “General Armitage Hux, you are hereby taken into Resistance custody.” The commander spoke slowly, clearly, but Hux wasn’t listening, his mind having gone numb as he looked at the woman.

                “How long?” Hux wasn’t looking at the commander, paying little attention to the soldiers who were binding his arms in gravity cuffs. “How long have you been a part of this?”

 He could hear emotion cracking his voice. Had she been part of the resistance the whole time?

                “Long enough to let them get a lock on that debit chip I gave you. No more, no less.”

                “I thought you were dead, Czeska…” Tears sprang into his eyes and he fought them back with as much dignity as he could muster. It didn’t seem possible. This had to be a dream, a hallucination. How had she survived the destruction of the _Sabaton_?

                “I had to make your buddies think that.” She said, her red eye bright, her tone one of cool amusement. She stepped forward with a smile, leaning quite close to him. He felt dizzy, wanting to grab her, pull her close and kiss her with all of his might. “You guys were so distracted blowing up my ship, you didn’t even notice me stealing one of your escape pods. Still kinda pissed about the _Sabaton.”_

                “You…” Hux licked his lips, knitting his brows. Her tone was cool, but there were dimples tugging at the blue flesh of her cheeks. “ _The Resistance_?” Hux breathed finally, feeling a sneer pull his lips back as he practically spat the word at her.

He could feel everyone’s eyes on them, acutely aware of the muzzles of blasters that were leveled at them both.

                “You’re angry.”

                “Yes, Czeska.” The words came falling out his mouth before he could even reason with himself. He grit his teeth, staring her down. “Yes, I am angry.”

                “Actually, my name is Ulivte’Sjes’Kua.” She said coolly, stepping back a little as she regained her bearing. Hux knit his brow, finally seeing her in a slightly different light.

                So she didn’t really want to know if he was upset, she just wanted to keep him placated…to keep him obedient and submissive. She was no different than Kylo, simply softer about her manipulation. More insidious.

                “Let’s move out.” The commander gestured with his rifle, pointing towards the door.

                In absolute silence, they entered the lift. Perhaps it was his imagination, but the entire group had a very somber feeling as they moved across the hangar without a word. He had expected some degree of elation, but there was no joy in the eyes of the men and women who had captured him.

                Stormtroopers and Resistance Soldiers alike lay sprawled across the durasteel floor of the hangar, the entire room stinking of blood and bile and the pungent ozone of blaster fire.

                Czeska avoided his gaze, not saying a word. Her face was utterly blank, gloved hands grasping her rifle tightly. There was something different in her now. Perhaps it was something in the way he saw her now, the real her. But there was that voice in the back of his mind that told him it was something _else._

 It still didn’t feel real to him. None of it did.

                After they were seated inside the shuttle, Czeska finally spoke, her voice so low, Hux had to strain his ears to hear.

“Please don’t shut me out, Hux. I couldn’t do it alone.” She said, her hands moving slowly across her blaster, turning the safety on with a sort of practiced care before sliding it into the holster on her hip. “I don’t blame you…for being upset. Armitage, but I… I couldn’t just abandon you to this fate. I couldn’t leave you with… _him_. I had to find a way.”

She put her hand on his arm, the soft weight making Hux jump slightly, his entire body recoiling.

“You betrayed me.” He breathed, casting a weary glance at Czeska’s commander, who was watching them closely. Czeska withdrew her hand, crossing her arms over her lap with a measured action.

He hated seeing her like this. He just wanted to kiss her, to taste the sweetness of her lips again, but the pain of betrayal felt like a beast eating at his insides.

Is this not what he wanted? To be with her again?

“I know damn well what you’re capable of, Czeska.”

“Yeah.” She breathed, her voice taking on the faintest of edge. He swore he could see tears on her cheeks, but he couldn’t be sure.

Was it just another tactic? Was she trying to appeal to his humanity?

 A dull, painful ache seized him and he looked away, unable to handle their proximity. He couldn’t wait to get off the ship, even if they locked him away, it would be better than being here.

Suddenly, she stood up, turning towards him, her body bristling, her face damp with tears.

“Listen, you pompous _sculag_ … your _wonderful_ little friends decided to blow everything I had to oblivion, that piece of shit dickwad burning the eye right out of the side of my fucking skull.” She gestured angrily to the eyepatch sitting flush against the scar tissue. Hux swallowed, unsure where the outburst had come from, or what direction it was headed.

 “I put my life, our k…” She inhaled sharply, blinking as she stopped mid-word. The entire shuttle had gone silent, everyone staring.

She stood, staring, her eye brimming with tears, anger and hurt etched onto her face. “Damnit, fuck you. And fuck me. Holy shit. I’m so fucking angry.”

“Private, sit down.” The commander’s face was impassive, though the edge of warning in his voice was telling enough.

“Oh, get bent.” She snarled, though her face changed moments after the words escaped her mouth. A few other soldiers held back stifled laughter, the commander’s face turning slightly red with anger, though he held his composure admirably. “Sorry, sir.” She sat down, her own face flushed with rage.

“Don’t worry, _sir_.” Hux snarled, his voice laced with sarcasm at the title. “She’s just like that sometimes.”

“Oh shut the fuck up. I see you’ve got that fruit up your ass again.” She pressed her palm to her forehead in frustration, her elbow on her knee. It was now that Hux noticed the slight swell of her stomach, the blood immediately freezing in his veins. “Would a little empathy once in a while kill you?”

Her voice broke, tears falling freely down her cheeks, dripping off eyelashes and staining her lap. Hux poured all his strength into reaching forward, ignoring the telltale click of the blaster rifle by his head as his fingers traced over the rough fabric on her swollen abdomen.

His vision blurred as he looked up at her.

“Czeska, are you?”

She nodded, her face against her palm, bared teeth gritted in frustration

“Is it…? Can Chiss and Humans even…?”

“The fuck do you think?” Her voice, though still uneven with tears took on a tone of slight amusement. Hux couldn’t tell if it was out of nerves or glee. Hot tears stained his cheeks and he let out a laugh, his fingers finding her free hand and giving it a soft squeeze.

                Despite his predicament, he couldn’t ignore the sudden elation that swept over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now you know the rest of the story, freindos.  
> I hope y'all enjoyed it. This is the first multi-chapter story I've completed in nearly a decade. I have an epilogue, but it's not critical so I'm kind of on the fence about publishing it. It just tied up loose ends. 
> 
> I really fucked around with Czeska's Chiss name and ended up doing a lot of google-fu on Chiss naming. It usually runs Clan-given name-tribe, so her clan would be Ulivte, given name Sjes of the clan Kua. Like Thrawn's real name is Mitth'raw'nuruodo. 
> 
> Her kid would be Hux-given name-Kua. I left the kid's gender up to basically making Hux and Czeska in the sims, and she ended up with a little boy with dark auburn hair and light blue skin (He did have his mothers eyes, though). Not sure how that would work genetically, but hey, it's Star Wars we're talking about.


	12. Epilogue

The Resistance base was not quite what Hux had expected, being far more structured and organized than he had expected, though it was still a glaring contrast to the stark, cold Imperial Academy he had grown up around as a boy.      

Armitage was hesitant to aid initially, despite several attempts to pry information out of him. He had to admit, though, at least they didn’t stoop to the same forms of torture Hux had been subjected to in The First Order.

                The biggest catalyst for his coming around was General Organa, who gently reminded him that it would be difficult to be a father if he was in prison, or worse, for war crimes.

She reminded him that her own son’s father had found himself otherwise occupied on numerous occasions, and while she still loved her boy, he was not the man she had hoped he would become.

                Hux understood what she meant without her having to say just _who_ her son was, his stomach twisting as he sat beneath her dark gaze. She was nothing short of formidable, but there was still an absolute grace about her.

                After that, Hux begrudgingly began to comply, giving out locations and plans, though never revealing the full details. He did, after all, still have a bit of pride.

He was surprised at how receptive everyone seemed to him, despite his past ties to the First Order. That isn’t to say the transition was easy; Armitage still found himself the subject to furtive stares and whispers, but people actually _tried_ to be amicable. He even made a few people he could almost call ‘friends’, much to his shock and partial dismay.

                Once the deal had been made with General Organa to cooperate, she presided over the informal and hurried marriage of Armitage Hux and Ulivte’Sjes’Kua, who was farther along than he had realized when he saw her in the dim lights of the star destroyer.

Roughly three months later, Czeska gave birth to a son; a small boy with skin lighter than his mothers, though he had the same red eyes. A fine, dark auburn fuzz covered his head and Hux knew immediately that Czeska’s words has been true; he certainly was the father. Even if he hadn’t been, it would have hardly mattered to him in the end.

                After some coaxing from Czeska, Armitage agreed on following Chiss naming traditions, and they named the child Hux’Saigyou’Kua. His clan name, but her tribe; an even deal.

                As he held Saigo in his arms, feeling the soft, warm weight of the child, he couldn’t help but feel fear that he wouldn’t be the father the boy deserved, that he would pass on the same horror and hurt that Brendol had left as a legacy.

                But Czeska had faith in him, and already Armitage could hope that he would be nothing like his own father. For one, he loved Saigo more than he had ever thought possible, and he loved the boy’s mother enough to support her decision to see out her promises to the Resistance, despite the overwhelmingly bitter taste it left in his mouth at times.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Czeska's ship's name was a nod to one of my favorite metal bands, Sabaton. 
> 
> Also, Saigo's name is a nod to Saigo Takamori, who led the Satsuma rebellion against the Imperial Japanese forces at the Battle of Shiroyama in 1877.

**Author's Note:**

> This is almost entirely self-indulgent writing about our lovely Hux.  
> Some friends of mine and I were joking about what could make Hux go good, and I took the idea and ran with it. I figure he's proud, he'd get fed up eventually.  
> I didn't really mean for it to end up fluff. You'll see what I mean later.  
> Also rated M for future mentions of abuse, sexual violence, and some dicking down because it's not a self indulgent fic without some dicking down.


End file.
